Yōsei
by Hikari Minamoto
Summary: COMPLETE. He’d seen her body lying there on the floor…bloody, broken, dead. But, here she stands. This is a dream he tells himself. Yet, those eyes that have haunted him for so long…This pain…why won’t it stop hurting? KakaRinObito
1. Departure

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"_**Yōsei"**_

Author: Hikari Minamoto

Summary: He'd seen her body, lying there on the floor…bloody, broken, dead. But, here she stands. This is a dream, he tells himself. Some kind of sick genjutsu. Yet, those eyes that have haunted him for so long seem to peer into the very depths of his soul. This pain…why won't it stop hurting?

Rating: T+

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of Mr. Kishimoto's characters.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

**Chapter 1 : Departure  
**

Dead.

They were all...dead.

The scent of blood was overwhelming – the young Jounin could almost taste the sickening sweetness of it in his unbearably dry mouth. He swallowed nervously, lone eye widened in shock.

The girl's body was curled into a loose ball of flesh, and hair, and...blood. It had unfurled from her like the petals of a flower – a flower made of blood and sorrow and tears. The knife was still clutched tightly in her right hand, its blade sticky with gore. The violent tear in her once-beautiful throat told the obvious tale of suicide.

Hatake Kakashi, age 16, stood weakly over the body of yet _another_ suicide – over the body of his last remaining teammate...his last friend.

"...Rin..."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

The funeral hadn't lasted long. In fact, thirty minutes had been all it took. Hardly anyone showed up really. After all, Kakashi mused – bitterness lacing his thoughts, she hadn't kept many close friends. And those she _did_ have she'd pushed away after...

"Kakashi."

"Hn?" he grunted, eye still focused on her small grave. She'd been too young. Obito had been too young. Minato had been too young... Why had the gods decided to take everyone when there was still so much life left to live?

The Sandaime gently laid a hand on the boy's shoulder. "It will be alright eventually."

Alright? It'd be _alright_? Kakashi wanted to laugh aloud, but this wasn't the time or place. It did happen to be a funeral – Rin's funeral actually. No, that didn't sound right, but...that's what it was: "Rin's Funeral". So wrong, it was _so_ wrong...

So instead of laughing, the silver-haired boy merely nodded. "I know," he said. "You don't have to worry about me, Hokage-sama."

"If you ever need anything, just tell me."

"_How about you turn back time? Maybe bring them back? Think you can help me there?"_ he scoffed silently. Like anyone could offer him comfort now. The notion was ridiculous. That had always been Rin's job, and Kakashi wasn't about to let someone else fill her place so easily...

He nodded again, and Sarutobi removed his hand – sensing that he wasn't welcome here anymore. "You know where to find me," offered the older man, turning and heading away. Just like everyone else.

Kakashi only stared at Rin's grave in response, listening to the retreating footsteps. Was it safe yet? Yes, they were all alone now. The boy sighed and removed the hitai-ate from his left eye, exposing the blood red iris for the first time in weeks.

"Obito and I are here, Rin-chan..." he announced hoarsely.

Kakashi shuddered as he felt tears pouring forth from the foreign eye. Obito still wept, even in death, as was usual. He'd always been such a crybaby...

Wait, no. He blinked his blue eye several times, trying to hold back what was truly inevitable. Today, this was acceptable. Today, _he_ could cry too. Kakashi bowed his head, fists clenched in frustration as his own tears began to escape him. Why? Why had this happened? Why did she do _this_?

"Rin-chan..." he choked through the thin fabric hiding his face. "...Rin-chan...Rin-chan..." The Jounin said her name again, vainly hoping that she might be able to hear him, rise from the grave, and smile saying that this had all been a big joke – gotcha. However, it was futile. There was no rising from the dead today. Rin was dead, and she would stay here – buried in the ground – for the rest of eternity. "_How cold she must be_," thought her former comrade. "_I wonder if she felt that way while..._"

Stop it. Stop thinking that. Kakashi forced the image of her lying there - eyes closed as if in slumber, face pale as the moon, blood viciously encircling her – out of his mind. _"No, it was painless,"_ he lied to himself. _"She didn't feel a thing."_

Yet, the memory of that wound kept pressing itself against his mind. It was crude. It was as if her blade had been dull, and her cuts had been forced. A proper blade would have slid right through, but this...no, this wasn't a proper cut at all. Kakashi felt his head swim a little and wiped furiously at his true eye. Obito could cry all he liked – he had loved Rin, hadn't he? But then again...

The silver-haired boy swallowed the thought. Right now, it was too agonizing to think about. He'd never see her again, why entertain such thoughts? No. Kakashi _definitely_ hadn't loved Rin at all. Not in the least bit.

"_Then why does it hurt so much?" _

She'd been his comrade - the one who healed his wounds, his hurts, his troubles...all with that quiet smile, the warm touches, those dancing eyes... Those eyes he'd never see again.

"_I should have been there for her. I should have been able to help somehow..."_

Everyone had their "outs". Some shinobi drank away their troubles, others found their comfort in the arms of lovers, and still others hid away their emotions so they could never hurt again. Kakashi had been one to hurl himself in harm's way - hoping that the constant danger and life-threatening situations would distract him from the painful memories of his father, of Obito. It had worked. But he'd been _too_ distracted it seemed – too distracted to notice he'd left Rin to fend for herself.

And then the Kyuubi had shown up. It was an absolute bloodbath. Kakashi and Minato-sensei had gone to fight, while Rin followed behind – "cleaning up" the battlefield by healing the wounded and ending lives painlessly if death was inevitable. The broken shinobi had been spared their pain, but she had taken it on in their stead. And when Minato had saved the village...something inside the young girl shattered.

Kakashi winced, remembering the memorial service. She'd been distant, quiet, cold. It seemed Rin's warm, loving manner had slowly begun to retract itself into the very depths of her soul. She'd isolated herself after the funeral – he could hardly remember seeing her. But then again, he'd been too busy doing missions with the ANBU. He hadn't had the time.

She'd been left alone.

The Jounin blinked warily, noticing that he'd finally stopped crying. Yet, the pain still remained lodged in his chest. Kakashi almost wished he could cry some more – cry it all away. Rin had cried too at first, but that had stopped after a little while. Kakashi supposed she had cried away all her tears, but maybe that wasn't it at all. Maybe she wanted to hurt – that way she could remember the boy who'd loved her...Obito that is, because Kakashi didn't love Rin. He couldn't. He didn't deserve to.

The young Hatake stared hard at the mound that marked where they'd left her. There wasn't even a stone or memento to honor her memory. Those who committed suicide were cowards – they didn't deserve to be remembered. Well, that's what the village elders said anyways.

Rin had probably had no "out". She had always kept her hurts bottled up inside, hadn't she? Obito had been able to talk to her before though. He and she were buds, Kakashi remembered. They always had a grand old time together – chatting away and laughing...he'd always been so annoyed by it. Now it was different. If only he could hear that sweet laughter once more, hear his friend's obnoxious comments. Obito...Minato...and now Rin...

He had seen how tired she looked all the time. He had seen how she shied away from the Uchihas, how she'd nearly vomit at the sight of blood. He had seen those beautiful sepia eyes fade into a dull brown. They'd lost their life, and she had lost her soul. Her will to live. She had lost her purpose.

Now this was how things had ended. He should have reached out to her. He should have offered the comfort she'd so desperately craved...yet he'd denied her over and over again. _"Such a cold bastard..."_ he told himself, thoroughly disgusted. _"This is your fault isn't it?"_

Now he was starting to sound like her. Rin had blamed herself so many times for Obito's death. "If only I hadn't been so weak," she'd murmured one day. "If only I had noticed that genjutsu earlier...Obito would still be here..."

Kakashi replayed his promise to him over and over. Why hadn't he been able to protect her? Obito must be furious. He'd loved Rin...but Kakashi hadn't. No. He hadn't loved her at all.

But truthfully, he did. Oh so much, and right now...right now it hurt like hell.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

A distant figure shivered in the icy breeze. The dull brown eyes watched him carefully, wondering what he was doing just standing there. Why was he acting so oddly? Oh yes, that's right. Perhaps it had something to do with her death.

Rin shouldered her bag tiredly and turned to go. She'd used so much chakra for that ninjutsu, _so_ much chakra! The girl could hardly see straight now. It was a miracle she was even conscious. Rin hadn't ever been one to have a lot of stamina after all, but now she had something to do. That something was disappear. Forever.

"A new life," she whispered, trudging heavily through the brush. "And new memories."

The girl paused momentarily and stole a parting glance at the silver-haired figure standing at her "grave". "Goodbye, Kakashi. Goodbye, Obito," she offered tentatively.

Then in a flash, Rin disappeared into the night breeze – dead to Konoha and dead to almost everyone who'd ever cared about her. _Almost_ everyone. Little did she know that someone would hold onto her memory - waiting, hoping, praying for the day she would return to him. Praying for the day when they'd meet again, be it in this life or the next. No, Kakashi would not forget her so easily as she'd hoped.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

'**Ello! I just wanted to pop in and say that I love this pairing and have wanted to do a fanfic like this for a while. However, I've been so busy with my other fic (Threnody of the Harbinger) that I've just pushed this one aside. Hope you've enjoyed it thus far, and sorry if it's rather angsty. ;P**

**I'll try to update soon and sorry it's such a short chapter. I'll be fixing that later on, so don't worry. **

**- Hikari **

**PS – I got the idea of Obito crying through Kakashi from bubblegum2000's oneshot, Metamorphosis. It's a very good story – you should read it sometime. ;) Anyways, just wanted to let you know that that wasn't a completely original idea.**


	2. Disturbing Her Rest

**Chapter 2****: Disturbing Her Rest **

"_I was the only one who didn't get you a gift..."_

Stop it.

"_I've finally thought of something..."_

Shut up.

"_This Sharingan."_

_Obito's once bright, mirthful eyes had dimmed – their light was fading quickly. He didn't have much time left. Rin was desperately clutching her friend's hand, tears running in rivers down her bruised and dirty face. Kakashi could only stare in shock at this proposition. _

"_Rin, do it quickly..." Obito had said. The girl choked back her sobs and obeyed, steadying her trembling fingers so she wouldn't bring him more pain. _

"_Come here, Kakashi." Her voice was weak as she spoke to him. Perfectly understandable. The Jounin obeyed and laid down on the spot she motioned to. Right next to Obito. The young Uchiha coughed violently, spraying Kakashi with his blood. The silver-haired boy winced as if acid had been thrown in his face, but something was keeping his ruined eye open. Rin had made sure to place her fingers there – ensuring that this part of him wouldn't move. _

_There wasn't much pain. The kunoichi's Shousen no Jutsu was perfect – the surgery flawless. It took less than fifteen minutes to transfer the Sharingan into Kakashi. Rin had always been so talented, he remembered. Mastering such techniques at such a young age...yet, her lack of combative skills had only brought forth his scorn instead of praise. _

"_You're weak," he'd said to her one day after training. "Perhaps you should train more instead of burying your face in those ridiculous books of yours."_

_Obito had called him an idiotic bastard – Rin was a genius medical nin. Without her, they'd all have died many times over. The silver-haired boy merely gave the kunoichi an icy stare as she shakily rose to her feet and dropped into a fighting stance once more. "Cut it out, Rin-chan. This dumbass isn't worth it." _

"_I'm not weak." Her eyes had narrowed, though not in hatred. Kakashi could faintly see tears forming at the corners. _

"_You can hardly spar with Obito, let alone me." _

"_Perhaps it will make me stronger."_

"_What? Being beaten to the ground again?" _

"_If that's what it takes..."_

_Obito stepped in between the pair at that point. He'd grabbed Rin by the shoulders and told her that Kakashi was a moron and had no sense. She'd only said, "No, Obito-kun. He's a genius...much smarter and stronger than I will ever be." The tears of defeat were blinding her – it was true, Kakashi thought now. He really was a moron. If she'd abandoned her books as he'd suggested, this would have never worked._

_Then the warmth of her touch was fading. He was no longer with Obito or Rin. There was only this dark void...it was choking him. Smothering him. He couldn't breathe. Kakashi tore at his mask, desperate for air. Suddenly something grabbed him from behind. He spun, ready to exterminate the enemy who had decided to—_

"_...Rin-chan..." _

_His breath hitched in his chest as she stared up at him with those eyes...those beautiful brown eyes that could look into his very soul if they wished. Her arms were still slightly extended – oh yes, that's right. She'd just attempted to embrace him, but he'd torn himself away. Again. The girl looked hurt. Pain leaked out of her being like water overflowing from a dam. "Kakashi-san..." _

"_I'm sorry, I didn't mean—"_

_Without warning, her hand was at her throat, a knife tearing into that soft flesh. Kakashi gaped in horror as she merely stood there, crimson liquid flowing freely from slender neck. Rin slowly looked up to meet his stare, the Sharingan in both her eyes. "You promised to protect me..." she whispered hoarsely, her voice gurgling and choking on the gore filling her throat. "You couldn't though, could you?"_

"_Rin...chan..." he faltered. Why couldn't he breathe? His head was swimming, his knees felt weak. "No..."_

_She smiled sadly, invisible tears flowing from her like this blood. Oh God, there was so much blood! Why wouldn't it stop?! _

"_I'm tired of remembering..."_

"_No...stop. I'll change. I'll protect you..."_

"_I'm sorry, Kakashi-san." _

"_Stop it, Rin!" He cried, latching onto her shoulders in desperation. "Heal yourself, damnit!"_

_Her face was pale as Death, but Rin only smiled that broken smile of hers. "I can't anymore. I...can't..." she trailed off, the light finally fading from the blood-red irises. _

_Kakashi froze. "No..." He shook her gently. "Wake up, Rin-chan." Her head only lolled back limply in response. She was dead. "Shit! Wake up! __**Wake up**__, Rin!!" _

"Kakashi?"

"_Wake up, damn you!"_

"Kakashi, wake up!"

The silver-haired man shot up, eyes bloodshot and vision blurred. His breathing was rapid and unsteady, silver hair was plastered to his forehead with sweat. "Rin-chan..." he breathed into the tense air.

Tsunade stood uneasily next to his bedside. Her worried look told him that perhaps he'd been a little too loud again. "Kakashi-san, I'll be frank with you."

"Sorry about that," he cut in. The Jounin rubbed his eyes tiredly and attempted to wipe away the sheen of sweat that had covered him. "Was I noisy?"

"I'm worried about your mental state right now. Perhaps some therapeutic assistance and a few sessions might—"

"Hokage-sama, really. I'm fine. A bad dream doesn't constitute me being institutionalized."

The blonde woman narrowed her eyes icily. "Perhaps _one_ dream wouldn't, but when you've been having the same dreams night after night after night – I would say that _something_ might be wrong."

He raised a silver eyebrow warily. "And how do you know it's the same dream?"

Tsunade turned and began to head out the door. "Because," she stated matter-of-factly. "You always say the same things."

Kakashi's stare hardened. "And what 'things' might I be saying?"

The Hokage paused. Her look was pitiful – how he'd always _hated_ that expression... "'Wake-up, Rin-chan'...'Heal yourself, damnit.' Those are the most frequent ones we hear, Kakashi. Seriously, I don't think it's healthy."

He turned away and stared blankly at the white hospital walls. "So everyone can hear that?"

"Yes. Quite well in fact."

"Sorry," he mumbled quietly. "It won't happen again. You have my word."

She only stared skeptically in response, not sure whether or not to believe him. After a moment of tense silence, the Hokage sighed heavily and threw her hands up in defeat. "Fine. But if this keeps up, I'm going to do _something_ about it. Got it?"

He nodded.

"Well, the brat and Sakura wanted to visit you later. Are you up for it?"

He nodded again.

"I'll send them in an hour or so. Jiraiya also wanted to see you. He was ranting about some kind of intel that he'd found – probably more of that pornographic shit you two read..."

Yes, it was pornographic. And yes, it was shit. But all the Jounin said was, "We all have our vices, Hokage-sama."

She rolled her eyes and stormed out, muttering something about "typical men".

The young man sighed heavily, returning his gaze to the empty walls. So, Jiraiya had done it, eh? Well, that wasn't exactly surprising, Kakashi supposed. He _was_ a Sannin after all.

The Jounin's memories momentarily drifted back to the River Country. He could have sworn that...no. No, whatever it was, it wasn't that. This was only a vain hope, a fleeting wish that his mind refused to let go of. He'd seen a girl yes, but it wasn't _her_. It could never be her, because she was dead - buried in the ground just a few miles from the Memorial Stone.

"_But those stripes"_, half his mind argued stubbornly.

"_Anyone could tattoo themselves like that." _

And who had that man been? Another Akatsuki member perhaps? His face had been hidden by a strange mask so his true identity might be hard to uncover. The pair had been standing in the middle of a clearing, talking and laughing together. Just like old times.._. "Stop it."_

"Oi! Kakashi!!" The old man burst into the room with a flourish. Could he _be_ any louder? Kakashi silently cursed, but held up a hand in friendly greeting.

"Yo."

The Sannin made his way over to the Jounin's bedside, waving a manila folder in the younger man's face. "Looky what I got here!" he practically sang.

Kakashi stared blankly at his visitor, eyebrows raised.

"C'mon! _Guess_!"

For crying out loud... "Research?"

"No, dumbass! It's that intel you wanted!" Jiraiya shouted, spraying spittle all over Kakashi's tired looking face.

He casually wiped it off, then reached out for the folder. "Thanks," was all he said.

Jiraiya crossed his arms over his chest as the Hatake began flipping through the reports and miscellaneous photographs. "So... 'Tobi' is what he's called?"

The older man nodded. "Yup. And apparently, he's one of their newer members. Used to be a bounty hunter, see."

"Interesting...Any known origin?"

"Nope. There's not too much more we know actually. What you see there is all we've got."

Kakashi sighed in defeat, rubbing his temples in frustration. Damn. "The Akatsuki don't usually associate with 'outsiders'...so why was he with that girl?"

"Girl?" Jiraiya's eyebrows waggled in excitement. "Was she hot?"

"I think it was...her."

The Sannin suddenly grew serious, eyes narrowing slightly. "Kakashi, you and I both know—"

"Yes, she's gone. But..."

"Kakashi, stop it. You can't _seriously_ believe that she's still alive?"

The Jounin shook his head. "No...That's an empty dream."

It was silent for a moment. Kakashi could sense the Sannin's scrutiny bearing down on him. It was stifling. "I know how it is..." the elder sighed after a moment. "It's driving you insane – tearing you apart from the inside out."

Was it? Kakashi didn't know what he felt anymore.

"I don't know whose got it better between you and I. Our loves...Both of them are...unattainable, Kakashi."

"I know."

"Do the books help at all?"

"Not much. They do however," he smirked sheepishly beneath his mask, "manage to fend off all the other suitors. They always say something about a 'pervert'."

"'Atta boy!" Jiraiya bounded over and ruffled Kakashi's hair with a prideful grin.

The Jounin accepted the "affections" with an indifferent tolerance. He was too tired to make much protest at the moment. The old man said a few parting words, then left...finally. What a relief. Kakashi flopped backwards onto his pillow, earning himself a loud creak from the old mattress. Ah, Konoha had spared no expense to ensure the comfort of their wounded.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Across the village, the ANBU head crashed into Tsunade's office. His panting was loud and terribly uneven – she could hear it through his mask.

"Hokage-sama!"

"Report, Shinobi," she demanded. "What's the matter? What's wrong?"

"Akatsuki. At the border."

"Have they _infiltrated_ the border?"

"Well..." The group shuffled uneasily.

"Spit it out!" the Hokage barked viciously. "Don't just stand there wasting my time!"

The head lowered his voice and took a small step forward. "There's only one. And..." he paused uneasily, earning an impatient glare from Tsunade. "He's got someone with him."

"And who would this '_someone'_ be? Don't push me, Shinobi. I am in no mood to play games today."

Another ANBU who had being hanging back now stepped forward, producing a simple manila folder marked 'DECEASED' in red lettering. Tsunade accepted it and flipped open the cover. The ANBU were not surprised when she nearly dropped the paperwork – a horrified gasp escaping her painted lips. The panic written plainly on her features might have been amusing in any other situation, but this...this was no laughing matter, was it?

The Hokage's expression suddenly hardened into one of anger and determination. "You're _sure_?"

"Yes, Hokage-sama. We all witnessed it. There could be no mistake – we sensed no genjutsu in effect."

Tsunade's grip on the heavy paper tightened until she was almost crushing it. Her eyes burned in a cold fury that could send children crying to their mothers. The group was in absolute shock when she announced, "We're digging her up. Call the Inazuka."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

The lone eye widened in what might be fear...perhaps anger. "She's _what_?!" he hissed.

Kakashi's self-proclaimed "eternal rival" nodded and slipped out the door, though not before poking his head around the frame one last time. "Just thought you might want to know..." he whispered loudly, then disappeared. An angry Hatake was not someone to mess with.

The silver-haired man threw his covers off and practically jumped off the bed. Screw recovery – he wasn't about to let someone desecrate the grave of his latest teammate...even if that someone was the Hokage. Damnit, this was more ridiculous than if she'd proposed scratching Obito's name off the Memorial Stone! How could Tsunade even _consider_ doing this?!

"Hatake-san! You mustn't act so rashly! Please, don't strain yourself so much!"

The nurses' desperate pleas fell on deaf ears. All Kakashi could think about right now was saving Rin. It was his last chance after all, wasn't it? This time...this time he wouldn't leave her. This time, he'd prove she mattered to him.

With a speed thought impossible for someone so injured, Kakashi flew to where he knew Rin's resting place to be.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"You want him to...what?" asked Kiba warily, his gigantic beast of a dog sitting next to him. "Seriously?"

Tsunade tapped her foot impatiently, eyes narrowed in a leer. "Yes, I do believe that's what I said. Now do it, Inazuka, before I _really_ get irritated."

The boy shrugged and patted Akamaru's shoulder. "Alright, boy. You heard her. Get diggin'." The dog snorted and began to ruthlessly tear into the soft earth - paws flying, tail beating the air in anticipation of what long-forgotten prize he might find. The group waited in the chill November air, shivering in what could either be cold or perhaps even excitement.

Then Akamaru barked.

"What is it, boy?" asked Kiba, sauntering over to the massive hole. "Find somethin'?"

The dog whined and climbed out of the mud, tail tucked between his legs. It seemed he didn't quite find what he'd been hoping for. Instead he'd found a coffin. Tsunade practically glared at the rotting box and motioned for Kotetsu and Izumo to lift it out. The elite Chuunin grumbled in silence – to do so audibly would mean certain death. The coffin was nearly half-way out when the deafening silence was interrupted by a bitterly cold, "What the _hell_ is going on here?"

Izumo and Kotetsu froze, unsure who they should be more afraid of – the psychotic woman or the seriously-pissed-off Jounin.

Kakashi looked like he was ready to murder someone (which was quite unusual considering he was usually too lazy to be so emotional). The Godaime nodded to her subordinates, signaling they should continue.

"Hokage-sama!" croaked Kakashi hoarsely, growing desperate. "Please! This is madness! Why is it necessary to disturb the dead in such a crude fashion?!"

Tsunade eyed him warily. "Kakashi-san, do you realize what's going on here?"

Was that a joke? She was digging up his friend after eleven years with no kind of explanation at all – hell no! He had no fricken idea what was going on!

Coolly, he replied, "No. I would, however, appreciate an explanation."

The blonde started to hand him the manila folder she'd received not too long ago...then hesitated. Was it really a good idea to do this? He was still recovering from using the Mangekyou Sharingan against Akatsuki member Deidara. Could he _really_ handle this? It was against her better judgment, but...

"Here. The report was filed less than thirty minutes ago."

Kakashi accepted the papers with an almost hungry look in his eye - scanning them, searching them for some kind of answer. She wasn't surprised to see his curiosity suddenly morph into stupefaction. The Jounin reread it, trying to comprehend these claims. Then he reread it again. Then once more for good measure.

"I don't believe it either, Kakashi-san. That's why—"

"Will her coffin not suffice?"

"Kak—"

"Do you really have to—"

"Kakashi!"

He closed his mouth and weakly looked away. So, she really _did_ plan on going through with it...but then again...No. No, they were wrong. He'd _seen_ her body. He'd held her in his arms. Her blood had stained his clothing as he carried her to the hospital, screaming for someone to save her... Then he'd buried her. Covered her with dirt. And said his goodbyes.

He couldn't do it again.

"I am going to make sure, once and for all, that Rin is still _here_ and not wandering around with some Akatsuki! Now, leave if you can't handle this, but it's for the greater good. Understand?"

Oh, he understood alright. He understood that this woman had no idea how to leave things alone or go about things with the sensitivity he yearned for. People were so Goddamn cold...and he truly hated them for it. Yet, Kakashi couldn't help but smirk. He was the same way. He always had been, and probably always would be. Maybe...maybe if Rin had stuck around...she might have taught him how to _feel_. How to truly love.

The coffin creaked as the Chuunin attempted to force it open. The silver-haired man had to look away. It was torture watching this, but he couldn't just leave now could he? He had to be here...he had to comfort her once they'd disturbed the rest she'd so desired. A loud _CRACK_ signaled they'd finally pried it open; the wood had splintered beyond repair, but it didn't matter. Tsunade had her evidence. There, in the bottom of this crude little box, lay a small skeleton – Rin's tattered robes hanging off the decayed bones.

Kakashi narrowed his good eye at the Hokage. "Are you satisfied, Hokage-sama?" he asked icily, his tone just short of disdainful. "She's still here."

Tsunade didn't look convinced. She stepped forward and reached into the coffin (much to everyone's horror), her hand reemerging with a piece of bone that had chipped off due to aging. "We'll know for sure once this has been genetically analyzed. I want to be _absolutely_ sure."

"Eh, should we put her back in then?" inquired one of the Chuunin casually.

Kakashi shot him an icy glare, causing the younger to straighten up and clear his throat uneasily. "Not until she's been given a proper coffin," growled the superior.

"Er, right. Of course, how foolish of me..." came the stammered reply.

Tsunade muttered something along the lines of "be back soon" then took off. Kotetsu, Izumo, Kiba, and Akamaru all made their hurried excuses to leave as well. It was obvious that Kakashi was very jealous of Rin – unwilling to let anyone intrude on what precious little time they had together. He merely nodded it off as they retreated from his presence. Finally...they were alone again.

Kakashi thought about letting Obito see Rin too, but... _"Right now,"_ he thought selfishly, _"I just want her to myself." _

The man gazed for what seemed like an eternity at the ruined box that held her remains. If he got any closer, he was afraid something might happen – though, he had no idea what. The silence between the pair was crushing him from the inside out. How he wished he could speak to her, if only for a moment – explain himself, beg forgiveness for abandoning her. But he remained unspoken. The Jounin was afraid not of her reply, but the lack thereof. It would only confirm her death once again.

"Rin-chan..." he said quietly into the frigid breeze. This was strangely familiar, thought the man. Here he stood at her grave, the wind his only companion. Oh yes, it was all too familiar for his liking. Kakashi turned away bitterly, only to find he was no longer alone. A certain Godaime stood not five yards from him and Rin, watching the man curiously.

"Kakashi-san..."

He straightened up, the lazy expression settling itself over his features once more. "Hokage-sama? That was...fast."

"I was able to analyze the genetic material with an enhanced set of equipment they just brought in from Sunagakure. What I found was most...disturbing."

He raised an eyebrow expectantly, keeping his calm façade with extreme difficulty at this point. "Hokage-sama, all I want is to let her rest in peace ag—"

"It's not Rin."

Kakashi nearly choked on his own breath. "...Excuse me?"

"This...person, it's not Rin."

The Jounin was at a loss for words. He wasn't sure whether he should be overjoyed or heartbroken – Rin was alive! He should be ecstatic, but right now...all he felt was misery. Absolute, devastating misery. So she'd left him...she'd let him believe she'd died...she'd played one piss-poor joke on Konoha. Kakashi's hand involuntarily clutched at his chest, tugging on the black undershirt that hugged his torso. Something felt wrong. It was all wrong. This was so Goddamn _wrong_!!

"Damnit..." he breathed. Why did it feel like there was no air? Why did his chest feel like it was going to explode? Why, _why_, _WHY_?! "Why, Rin?"

Tsunade's expression softened slightly. "Kakashi-san, we'll find her. Don't worry."

He desperately clutched for the nearly-forgotten reports lying on the grass. Where did it say they'd seen her? On the border? What were the exact coordinates again?

"Kakashi..."

His icy blue eye hardened suddenly. "I'll find her," he murmured, flipping through the pages. "And I'll bring her home, back where she belongs."

The Hokage shook her head sorrowfully, pity written all over her face. There would be no rest for this man until he'd found that which he'd lost so long ago. Until he found his love. His Rin-chan.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

**Hello again, and 'sanku for the reviews! I very much appreciate them. ;D**

**Sakra-chan****: Why, thank you! I was personally rather pleased with that first chapter myself, but I don't know if I can keep it up. xP And thanks again! So far, so good.**

**Tisha-Lilliane****: You flatter me! Better stop before my head explodes! xD**

**Eldr-Fire****: I'm glad you liked it! This chapter wasn't too angsty, but...it'll get better later on. **

**Um, not much to say on this chapter other than it takes place right after Team 7 gets back from defeating Sasori/Gaara revived, etc. It's when Kakashi's still hospitalized. Anyways, I think that's about it!**

**- Hikari**


	3. Resurrection

**Chapter 3****: Resurrection **

He couldn't take it anymore... He had to do something. _Anything_. This idle state was driving him mad! Kakashi stared out the window listlessly, Naruto's incessant babble creating filler noise in the back of his mind. Sakura merely stood there, head buried in a book she'd been assigned to read by Tsunade – "_Investigating Theorems and Analytical Procedures: Guide to the Human Chakra Systems; Volume VII, Ed. X_". He hadn't been able to look at her long – sepia locks would involuntarily replace pink; twin wine-tinted tattoos would suddenly stain her cheeks. Everything about Sakura screamed "Rin", and frankly, he couldn't handle seeing that right now.

"I'll be back," the Jounin sighed, hobbling over to the door. It was amazing how annoying crutches could be.

Sakura snapped the monstrous tome shut, her emerald eyes flashing indignantly. "Kakashi-sensei, you _know_ what Tsunade-sama said! You're in no condition to go wandering around, especially after you went out into the cold just an hour ago!" she lectured, waggling a finger at him in reprimand. Kakashi hated this new "more-educated" version of Sakura.

"Oi! Kakashi-sensei, she's right," injected the blonde. "You've gotta get better so we can do some more serious training. This new pansy-ass teacher they replaced you with _sucks_!"

The Jounin's true eye only stared lazily at his students. "You two don't have to worry. I'll be fine – I just need a bit of fresh air, alright?"

"But you were just _out_ in the fresh air!" protested the pink-haired girl. "How much more do you need?!"

He grinned sheepishly, continuing out into the hall. "Just enough to get lost on the path of life."

His students could only watch in dismay as their sensei left despite the Hokage's orders.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Damnit. Tsunade was right. Perhaps he _had_ strained himself a little too much...

Kakashi struggled onward, sweat beading onto his flushed skin. It was now that he became thankful for crutches – blessing them for carrying his tired form so far. Without these beautiful wooden sticks (he supposed) the Jounin wouldn't even be able to stand, let alone walk.

Ah, here it was. He could see the clearing just ahead – he was almost there. After the revelation of Rin's survival, Kakashi needed to have a good, long talk with—

He stopped dead in his tracks.

A girl...yes, a girl raised her head slowly, those beautiful sepia irises filled with curiosity and a mild surprise. Her form was bent over the Memorial Stone as if she'd been studying the names, searching for a lost comrade. The mahogany ink still scarred her cheeks – after so long, they still looked the same. Her hair was longer though – he could tell even if she'd tied it back haphazardly. Rin...it was _Rin_!

The Jounin could only gape at her, cerulean eye boring into her sepia ones. The way she shifted uncomfortably and looked away told him that perhaps he was staring _too_ hard. A dream? Some kind of sick genjutsu? "R-Rin...chan..." he breathed incredulously, starting to hobble forward. It took a few seconds to realize he hadn't gotten anywhere. Were his legs still working?

The girl's surprise increased tenfold. "Sorry...but have we met?" Her voice, it was still so sweet and gentle. It was like the—

Wait.

Go back.

"Rin-chan?" he repeated, staggering a few steps forward. It felt like he was plunging into a dark abyss. The Jounin could hardly see straight._ "Stop with the jokes already!!"_ he wanted to scream. His humor was starting to run short. "It's me: Hatake Kakashi."

Her eyes were lost and confused; she started to back away from him – uncertainty painted on her features like an ugly mask. "I'm sorry, I think there's been a mistake."

Mistake? There'd been a _mistake_? Kakashi felt that same pain starting to build up in his chest – the same pain he'd felt eleven years ago after her supposed "death".

"Rin! How can you not remember?!" he croaked hoarsely. "You expect me to believe you've forgotten all this after only eleven years?"

The brown eyes grew wider as he continued his broken advance. She was either too shocked or too scared to move. "W-What are you talking about?" she whispered. "Who _are_ you?!"

"We were teammates! Comrades!" He drew closer – they were only a few yards away from each other now. "Friends..."

"You're delusional!" she protested weakly. "I'm not even a _kunoichi_, so how could we be teammates?!"

Kakashi froze. Did she really not remember? Had she really forgotten all those years together? Those long days of training? Those nights when they'd slept around the fire? Had she forgotten Obito? The tragedy? ...Had she forgotten _him_?

He reached up and held his head, trying to steady his trembling legs at the same time. It was proving difficult. Was this another nightmare? Yes, it had to be...but why wasn't he waking up? The air...there was no air. "Why...?" he mumbled beneath his mask. "Why did you do it?"

Rin's eyes remained cold and distant, fearful and curious all at once. "Do...what?"

"All of it..." he said brokenly, gazing mournfully into both her eyes with his one. "Why did you do...all of _this_? Why did you leave the village? Why did you make me think you'd died?! Do you have _any_ idea of what you've done?" His voice grew thunderous and heated – a rare occasion indeed.

If Rin had been frightened before, it was nothing compared to what this angry side of Kakashi brought forth. He watched her tremble violently, tears filling those beautiful, warm eyes he'd ached to see for so long, that gaze he'd craved for so many years...but this wasn't exactly what he'd had in mind.

"Rin-chan...I'm sorry. I didn't mean—"

"T-Tobi-kun..." she whispered hoarsely, interrupting the apology. "Tobi-kun!"

"'Tobi-kun'...?" repeated the silver-haired man. It was now his turn to be confused. "Who...why?"

As if summoned by a blood-contract, said Tobi emerged from the thick brush surrounding this clearing. What an odd sight it was – here came a man, covered from head to foot, and wearing a fiery orange mask with only one eyehole. Kakashi, needless to say, was rather surprised. He dropped the crutches and into a fighting stance instinctively, a sudden rush of adrenaline giving him strength. Who was this man? And why was Rin with him? How were they connected? Was it Tobi who'd erased her memory?!

Kakashi snarled at the thought. If it _did_ happen to be this 'Tobi', Kakashi would ensure a beautifully orchestrated, drawn-out death for him.

"Rin-chan? Is something wrong?" asked the masked figure gently, approaching her side as easily as if they'd known each other for years. He put a gloved hand on her shoulder reassuringly, telling the girl that he was now here to protect her.

Kakashi wanted to murder him. Chop him up into little bits. And feed him to the Ninken - bit by Bloody. Fucking. Bit.

"Tobi-kun..." sighed Rin gratefully. "I'm fine. I just..." The girl gave Kakashi a worried glance before turning her attention back to the Akatsuki. The Jounin was a forgotten memory. Not worth her time. Not worth being remembered.

Tobi cocked his head over to one side in curiousity. "Was this man...bothering you?"

Rin shook her head vigorously. "Ah, no! Not at all, it's just...are you _sure_ I wanted to come here?"

The man nodded. "Indeed you did, Rin-chan. I remember it very clearly."

"A-Alright...um, can we go somewhere else though? I'm..." There it was again. She gave him that same uneasy look – the look that said he was some kind of dog who might attack at any moment.

Kakashi pushed his gathering feelings of despair aside for now. There were more important things to worry about...like this Akatsuki. "I believe I need to see your paperwork, Akatsuki-san." His tone was icy and aloof. Very menacing indeed coming from a Hatake. It plainly suggested, _"I want you to die, you fucking bastard"_...without all those nasty words.

Rin shifted towards Tobi unconsciously, her hands clutching at his robes in need of security. A low chuckle emitted from behind the mask, though it wasn't menacing. It was merely as if Kakashi had just cracked a very funny joke (though that would be highly improbable). "Eh...paperwork? Erm...Hatake-san, I'm afraid that neither of us have any. Would you be willing to make any exceptions perhaps?"

Kakashi only pulled a kunai in response.

Tobi held up his hands, while Rin gasped in surprise. "Eh, no need to become violent over _paperwork_, Hatake-san!" protested the Akatsuki.

The silver-haired Jounin narrowed his good eye. So this 'Tobi' knew his name, huh? Well, that wasn't too surprising...he did happen to be in a lot of criminals' bingo books. "You'll need to have a little chat with the ANBU about that. I don't believe I have the authority to grant any _exceptions_..."

"Not even for Rin-chan?"

"For her, yes. For you, no."

Tobi shook his head sorrowfully. "Ah, well I'm afraid that it won't work then. You see, Rin-chan and I are inseparable. Isn't that right, Rin-chan?"

The girl nodded nervously, watching Kakashi with those frightened eyes that screamed for help – for some kind of sense to be made from this whole screwed-up situation. "Tobi-kun and I will leave together if paperwork is what you require, Hatake-san." Her voice was quiet and demure, just as it had always been. It was soothing music to his tired ears.

"Rin will stay with me. Here. Where she belongs." Kakashi's voice was tense, strained. He figured she wouldn't be pleased with this demand.

He was right. Rin's eyes widened as she clutched desperately for Tobi's arm, begging for his protection. The Akatsuki sighed heavily and prepared to fight. "I'm afraid that that is not an option, Hatake-san. As I said before, Rin-chan and I are inseparable."

An animalistic growl rose from the Jounin's throat. "Then _I_ shall be the one to separate you," he snarled, springing forward with god-like speed. The Akatsuki seemed clumsy, tripping over a rock as he tried to dodge the kunai. Yet, Kakashi knew it was probably a ruse – an act to make him lower his guard. It wouldn't work.

However (much to Kakashi's surprise), Tobi then sidestepped, snatched Rin, and bounded off into the thick underbrush - though not before the Jounin managed to slice open a finger and wipe his blood onto the Akatsuki's cloak. Tobi called out with haunting cheerfulness: "You don't know how protect her, Hatake-san." What the hell was that supposed to mean? Kakashi cursed silently as he contemplated their hasty retreat into the darkness – he was already severely weakened from his fight with Deidara...and now another one? But he knew this was necessary. Rin's life was the one at stake – not his. He had to get her back, no matter what the consequence might be for him. If he could never walk again, then fine. If he could no longer see, then so be it. If he should die, then at least he could die in peace.

Rin was home, and Kakashi wasn't about to let her leave again so easily. "I will bring you back, Rin-chan..." he murmured, pulling a scroll from his weapon's pouch.

"_Kuchiyose: Tsuiga no Jutsu!!_"

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Are we safe yet?" came the nervous whisper. "He just attacked you for no reason! This is such a strange village, Tobi-kun...I don't think I like it here. Let's leave now while we can."

Tobi snickered. "Eh, Rin-chan? You scared of that guy?"

She huffed and crossed her arms. "Well, a little. He...he just seemed..." Rin searched for the right words. She didn't know what to think of Kakashi at the moment.

The Akatsuki motioned for her silence – something wasn't right. He looked around apprehensively. The silver-haired Jounin couldn't attack them here. Not without being seen or heard somehow. That was the beauty of autumn – dry, dry leaves...everywhere. And pair that with a wide open field? Psh. It'd be hard to come at them unnoticed...unless...

"Rin-chan!! _Move_!"

The girl obeyed without hesitation, though one could plainly see the confusion written in those warm, brown eyes. She took off running across the dried-out grass. There was a distant rumbling sound...and it was steadily growing louder. It was approaching them more quickly than Death itself, she supposed. Rin suddenly stumbled over a rotten log, hidden from the world by decaying plant matter that fed on it. The girl struggled to her feet and turned to find Tobi...

Surrounded. By..._dogs_? _"What the hell?"_

"T-_Tobi-kun_!!" she screamed in horror, her gentle voice turned shrill and harsh. "Tobi-kun, NO!" She was cut short as something wrapped its arms around her body – crushing, squeezing her so hard she could hardly breathe. So hard that she couldn't escape. "_You_..." the girl spat at Kakashi.

The Akatsuki seemed to be having a hard time with the Ninken. His clumsiness didn't work well against a highly-trained pack of killing machines. He did, however, manage to hold his own.

The Jounin leaned down to whisper something in Rin's ear, keeping an eye on Tobi at the same time. "I can't let you leave us again," he said. "You need to—_OOMF_!!" Something collided into his stomach with a force great enough to make him double over. Kakashi kept his grip on her though, his will too strong to merely be beaten away.

"Let go of me!! _Let_ _go_! Tobi-kun! Tobi-kun!!" she cried in desperation, attempting to wriggle free from Kakashi's not-so-loving embrace.

The Akatsuki answered with a sorrowful, "Rin-chan! Hold on!"

"I'm taking her back to the village. You may follow us if you wish, but the ANBU aren't so friendly with Akatsuki members." Warning given, the Hatake took off...Rin still captive in his embrace.

Tobi cried out in livid frustration. Though he knew the silver-haired man wouldn't hurt Rin physically, he was afraid of what emotional wounds might be reopened. It was a bad idea to have come here in the first place...but this is what she'd asked for. Almost 32 months to the day...this is what she'd begged of him.

"_Please, Tobi-kun..." _

"_Rin-chan, you and I both know—"_

"_Please! As your friend, I am begging you! I must set my affairs in order before it's too late!" _

_He couldn't resist those eyes of hers. They'd always been his weakness. "Alright, alright. We'll return to Konoha when your time has passed."_

"_I'll hold you to that," she'd joked lightly. "'Cuz you know I'll have forgotten until then." _

"_When you awake, we shall be in Konoha once again. I promise."_

Damnit! He'd been planning on actually being _with_ her the entire time! Who knew what was going to happen now that she was alone and it was almost—

Tobi viciously disposed of the dogs now. It was a good thing they were summons – merely poofing away instead of lying there, broken and bleeding from his furious blows. "Rin-chan..." he hissed. "I'll find you. I won't leave you at the mercy of your memories any more..."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"R-_RIN_?!" Tsunade leapt from her seat, but didn't get any further than that. "Report, Shinobi! _Where_ have you _been_?!"

Kakashi winced at this sudden demand. As if Rin weren't already frightened enough...of him. Now she had to worry about a psychotic Hokage questioning her too.

The girl only stared blankly at the Godaime. "Ah, um...I think you've got it all wrong. I'm not a shinobi at all, Hokage-sama!"

"What's wrong with you?" barked Tsunade coldly. "Are you playing games here, or do you _seriously_ not remember?"

Rin looked even more confused, her brow furrowed anxiously. He could see the tremors running across her skin – see the fear in her eyes. "I-I have no idea what _any_ of you are talking about! I'm not the same 'Rin' you're thinking of!"

"_Damnit, Rin_!" The Hokage slammed her fists down on the desk. "Don't tell me that! You _are_ the Rin that we thought we'd buried eleven years ago, now TELL US THE TRUTH!!"

Kakashi stepped in front of Rin protectively at this point. It was obvious that Tsunade wasn't thinking clearly – the sudden shock of this all was driving her mad as it had done to him. "Hokage-sama, please," he protested calmly, carefully resuming his stoic façade. "Perhaps there is a logical explanation for this. A medical examination might reveal—"

"Fine. We'll 'examine' her and see what the hell went wrong..." snapped the Hokage impatiently. She nodded to a pair of medical nin who'd been restlessly awaiting an opportunity such as this. "Take her to the hospital, Intensive Care Unit. Until we know what's going on, I want her under strict observation. Got it?"

"Of course, Hokage-sama! Right away!" The pair grabbed Rin (though not too harshly) and led her away. The Jounin wanted to offer some kind of comfort, but she was gone before the right words could come.

Their enthusiasm made Kakashi sick. What was Rin to them? Some kind of sick little experiment?

"Hokage-sama, perhaps I could—"

"Forget it, Hatake."

He looked taken aback. "Hokage-sama, please. We were comrades. Perhaps if she saw me for long enough without the stress of—"

"Kakashi!" The blonde narrowed her eyes at him. "Right now, we don't know what the hell's wrong with her. It's obviously Rin, but something's different. I need to know _what_ before anyone's allowed to 'visit' her. Stress can trigger many unpleasant side effects, and God knows she's had more than her share of it already."

He sighed inwardly, his crestfallen expression enough to break one's heart, though it was merely a reflection of his own shattered soul. "Of course, Hokage-sama. Please let me know as soon...as...soon..." Was the room getting darker? Or was it just him? Kakashi felt unusually cold. A very distant "Kakashi? Kakashi?!" reached his ears, but...this tiredness was overwhelming. Perhaps he'd respond after he slept a little...

"_Rin-chan..."_

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"...Ninjutsu...she...amnesia..."

He could only snatch at fragments of these confusing phrases. _"What's going on? Where am I?" _Kakashi forced his good eye open, blinding white light forced it shut again. _"Ahh...the hospital. How lovely..."_

The voice outside suddenly grew angry. "Of course we should tell him!"

"And if he doesn't take it well?"

"How Hatake-san deals with it is his own business, but our responsibility is to report this!"

Eh? Report what? Was something wrong with Rin? The horrible thought jolted him upright in an instant. However, the thunderous pain inside his skull made him think twice about making another sudden movement. How long had he been out? A few hours? A day maybe? A week?

The door suddenly swung open with a loud _CREAK_.

"Kakashi-san?"

He stared disinterestedly at a rapidly-approaching Hokage plus two apprentices. "Hello, Hokage-sama. Shizune-san. Sakura..." he said tiredly.

"How are you feeling?"

Like shit. "Much better, thank you," he lied through his teeth. "Is there any word on Rin? How is she doing?"

Tsunade motioned for Shizune and Sakura to leave, which they did quite quickly. That couldn't be good...

"Kakashi-san, this might be difficult to hear..."

"_Please, for God's sake, woman! Spit it out already!" _he hissed silently.

"Rin has always been an extremely intelligent individual... If she'd remained here in Konoha, her medical prowess might have rivaled my own eventually. At only thirteen years of age, Rin had mastered the _Shousen no Jutsu_ – a feat few have ever accomplished. Yet..."

The Jounin raised an eyebrow. "'_Yet'_...?" he pushed.

"It seems there were a few other jutsu that she'd mastered – justu that no one has ever heard of, let alone performed."

"So...she _invented_ her own techniques?" This was getting stranger by the second. Was that really what she'd been doing all those years? All those years he'd left her alone, Rin had been creating her own jutsu? Fair enough, he himself had invented the Chidori, later revised to Raikiri. But Rin? Never in a thousand years had he expected her to experiment with something so potentially dangerous.

"I believe there were two of them. The first," she held up a forefinger, "staged her suicide. The second," she held up another, "erased her memories."

Kakashi felt dizzy again. "Erased her...memories?" he repeated incredulously. "...forever?"

Tsunade shook her head much to his relief. "Not exactly...though we're not sure what the specific effects of her jutsu are as of yet, I do believe that Rin will return to her old self with time."

Her old self...did he really want that? Did Kakashi _really_ want her to become...miserable? Again? Could he live with himself if that happened? After so many years, she'd finally become happy. She seemed so...young. So innocent. It was the way she was meant to be. The way he _wanted_ her to be.

He reached up and tentatively touched the hitai-ate – ensuring that Obito had been covered properly. It would seem ridiculous if Tsunade saw half a man cry. "Alright," he replied slowly. "Please let me know if anything else comes up."

"I will be sure to keep you updated, but for now, please just concentrate on resting. Rin won't be going anywhere very soon."

"When can I see her?"

The older woman hesitated, obviously taking several things into consideration. "You may see her now for few minutes...if you feel ready."

The Jounin eyed her. "If I 'feel ready'?"

"I'll be honest with you, she really is...different..."

"...how 'different'?"

Tsunade looked at him, her eyes sorrowful. "I'm warning you – don't expect her to be the Rin of eleven years ago, Kakashi. You'll only be disappointed. _Sorely_ disappointed."

He watched as she turned and walked out, heels clacking on the tiled floor. The man clenched his fists slowly, then relaxed them. Did he want to go see her? _Was_ he ready? How he'd dreamed for this day – this moment, but it wasn't the joyous reunion he'd anticipated so hungrily. No, this was far from joyous.

But did it matter? So what if she didn't recognize him? It was still Rin right? ...right? Kakashi rubbed his torso gently – she'd surely left a mark there. The girl had attacked him full-heartedly...this was so screwed up. So, so, _so_ screwed up.

The Jounin sighed and cautiously climbed from his bed. He had to see her again. Just for a moment, even if he wasn't ready to.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

The girl's eyes widened in surprise. Kakashi silently thanked the gods – there was no fear in her expression this time. "Ah, Hatake-san?" she inquired skeptically. "Are you allowed to be here?"

He nodded, not trusting himself to speak just yet. The long trek two floors down had taken its bitter toll on the Jounin. His emotions were proving hard to keep in check while his body remained in a fatigued state.

"Oh, alright. Um..." Rin rubbed tiredly at her forehead. Was something wrong? Did she have a headache? Were they providing her with proper care? Kakashi's weary mind reeled at the doubts filling his skull like a clogged sink filling with dirty water.

She seemed to have noticed this. "Hatake-san? Are you alright? Perhaps you should be resting."

"I'll be fine."

"Oh...right." The girl looked down nervously, fiddling with a loose thread on her blanket. The awkward silence was almost unbearable.

"I'm sorry."

Her sepia irises rose to meet his blue. "For kidnapping me?"

The silver-haired man studied the floor carefully, suddenly finding the tile pattern quiet fascinating. "For scaring you. For yelling at you...for everything."

The girl shrugged. "I'll be fine. I just want the Hokage to finish whatever it is she's doing with me so I can go home."

Home? "But you're home now, Rin-chan."

"No, I live in the River Country," she protested. "I really don't understand why you all think that—"

"Rin!" Her mouth snapped shut. "Listen to me, what did you do to yourself? Why can't you just _remember_?" His voice was gentle, yet stern – quite akin to the "lecturing" voice he used with his students.

"I don't know!" she cried, growing upset. "I don't know what it is you people want me to remember!!"

Kakashi was suddenly at her side, hand clasped tightly on her shoulder as if she were the last refuge he had to cling to in this life. "Me!" he breathed faintly, desperately. "I need you to remember _me_..."

It wasn't surprise that filled those eyes now - only heartache. Simple, unadulterated heartache. "I'm trying...but I _can't_. I'm sorry...I'm so sorry..." she whispered. He could almost taste the pain in her voice.

"No. _I_ should be sorry." Kakashi released her and limped despondently from the room, shoulders slumped in failure. "It seems I still think only of myself, even after all these years."

The girl watched as his figure retreated from her presence – bewilderment mingling with a long-forgotten anguish that she couldn't quite remember. Why? Why did he want her to remember him so badly? Rin felt a sharp pang rip through her skull, bringing her hands to her forehead in agony. The spasm lasted for almost five minutes – far too long in her opinion. As it finally left her, Rin relaxed her tense muscles, breathing heavily and wiping at the sheen of sweat that covered her skin. They were becoming more frequent.

"That's...the third today..." she panted. It seemed a chronic migraine had taken up residence behind her soft eyes, but these intensive spasms came and went as they pleased. She wished they would stop. Two weeks had passed since the first one came, and that's when Tobi had announced that they'd take a little trip to the Fire Nation. He claimed she'd asked for this a few years back – why couldn't she remember that though? It seemed her whole life was filled with these "holes" which she couldn't quite make sense of. Couldn't quite...remember. Why? Why couldn't she remember?

Tsunade had mentioned something about a jutsu she'd created, but that only seemed ludicrous to Rin. She'd never been a kunoichi – hell, she'd never even attended an Academy...right?

"Ah!" The girl clutched her head again, desperation evident in her pained cry. Again? And so soon? What was going on here? What was wrong with her?! "Ngh...it...hurts..."

"_I got you this medical pouch!"_

"_Minato-sensei!"_

"_We're training together in Area 27 later today..."_

"_Our mission is in Rock..."_

"_Obito-kun!"_

"_Stop it you two! Can't you quit fighting just for five minutes!?"_

"_I'm the only one who didn't get you anything...I've finally thought of something...this Sharingan..."_

Voices echoed around the room, haunting visions from another's past filled Rin's mind. It was driving her mad. "Stop..._STOP IT_!!" she shrieked violently, tearing at her soft hair – fingernails raking the sides of her gentle face. The long ugly, scratches stood out as prominently as the rapidly reappearing scar across her throat. Her soft eyes grew wild and frenzied, her breathing harsh and loud. "No..." she whimpered into an empty room. "Not yet..."

"_You're unexpectedly stubborn..."_

"_We came to save you, Rin! It's alright now!"_

"_It looks like it's over for me...The right side of my body...there's no feeling..."_

"_No...This...Why..."_

"_...I'm already...going to die..."_

"_Kakashi...take care of Rin..."_

"_I'll look after you for Obito...Because of that, I'll protect you even if I die."_

"_Obito liked you...loved you...you were important to him...Because of that, I'll protect you through life and death."_

"Shut up!! I...No! STOP!!" begged the girl. "Please..."

Mere moments later, a nurse hurried into the room, hearing her desperate pleas. "Rin-san? Is something—" She stopped dead in her tracks when she caught sight of the patient. "R-Rin...san..."

It was too late to reason with her. Rin had risen to her feet and now stood stonily – her face devoid of any emotion, her glassy eyes vacant and empty. Except for the tears. There were rivers of them. They mixed with the blood trickling from her scratches, creating a dancing stream of pain. "It's...too...soon..." she whispered.

"Rin-san! What's wrong? Let me—"

_SLAP!_

The nurse staggered backwards, holding her face in shock. "W-What was that for?"

Rin's gentle face suddenly contorted – the animosity painfully obvious upon those once pretty features. "Get out!!" she screamed. "Get. OUT!!!"

The frightened woman ran out the door, shouting out for help. Rin smirked. She wanted to scream for help too.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"_Attention all units: please converge at ICU Seven! Repeat. Attention all units: converge at ICU Seven!"_

Kakashi stared at the intercom with mild disinterest. ICU Seven? Funny, he'd just come from around there.

Wait.

ICU Seven?

...Rin.

The man tumbled out of bed and onto the cold stone floor. "Rin?" he croaked hoarsely. "Rin!"

A passing medic on her way downstairs paused momentarily outside his door. "Hatake-san, please don't worry. Everything is fine. We have it under control."

As if the gods themselves had been listening in, the intercom suddenly blared: _"All medical units, repeat: Get the __**hell**__ down here!" _The voice was desperate. Not exactly a good sign that everything was "under control". She hurriedly shut his door and took off running. What the hell was going on?

And then he heard it. From two floors down, he heard her scream.

It was a strangled cry – the kind you heard on the battlefield. The kind you heard upon killing someone. The kind that could rip your heart in two.

There it was again. Kakashi winced in agony and tugged at his shirt, trying to relieve this pain that was consuming him. Why wouldn't it stop hurting? "Rin-chan..." he groaned, disgusted that he was too weak to go to her. To comfort her. To tell her it'd be alright.

Suddenly his door flew open, slamming against the wall. Kakashi stopped breathing.

Rin stood there, brown eyes dull - filled with pain. Tears. And blood. Blood? Wait. Kakashi blinked twice, his good eye rather unsure of itself. Yes, there was blood, but it was from those marks. What had she done? What had happened down there? The blood and tears were staining her cheeks, covering the tattoos with a fresh coat of ink. Ink that would never wash away.

"Rin?"

His voice snapped her attention to him fully. Until now, she'd merely been staring blankly into his one eye. "Kakashi-san..." she breathed heavily.

"...I want to see Obito."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

**:sighs heavily: Well, I'm not exactly happy with this chapter. To explain why would take too much time, so...I won't bother with it. ;P I think I need a beta...volunteers? Anyone... :cue cricket chirping:**

**Anywho, 'sanku for the lovely reviews!**

**Lili-Yamamoto****: That's a good thing...right? xD**

**Eldr-Fire****: I'm glad you like(d) it so much! And yes, Grave of the Fireflies makes me cry lots too. Very, very sad movie. **

**SongoftheDarquePhoenix****: Haha, thanks. I'm trying, I promise.**

**Sakra-ch****an: Hehe, again. I'm flattered. And thanks for the...luck-wishing? I think that's the right word for it... :goes off to look:**

**icecreamlova****: Well, I hope you like it! **

**Anyways, I'll explain a little more of what happened next chapter, and sorry if this was way long. It's my longest chapter yet (13 friggin' pages)!! Soooo...until then, I'll be feverishly pounding away on my keyboard. **

**- Hikari**


	4. For Freedom

**Chapter 4****: For Freedom**

"...I want to see Obito."

The demand was harsh and almost unbearable to hear. There wasn't any "Hello, Kakashi. I remember you now," or even a "Kakashi – it's so good to finally see you again!" No. She only cared about _Obito_. Not Kakashi.

The Jounin was so completely dumbfounded, all he could manage to do was stare blankly at his new visitor. But it seemed Rin was short on time. She shut the door, locked it, and quickly strode over to his bed. "Kakashi-san, _please_!" she pleaded desperately, not even bothering to look into his true eye. No – she was staring hard at the spot behind his hitai-ate, her hand tentatively reaching for the steel-plated cloth. The silver-haired man couldn't believe what he was watching here. Rin really had changed, hadn't she? Or maybe she'd always been like this, and he just hadn't cared to notice...

Kakashi snatched her hand and pulled it away from his face. "It's good to see you too, Rin-chan. I'm glad you finally remember me," he told her dryly.

The girl took a step back – her brown eyes observing him carefully. "I'm sorry," she mumbled. "But it is a necessary procedure."

Procedure? Kakashi narrowed his good eye. What the hell was she talking about? Seeing Obito or forgetting all about him? It seemed those two things were inevitably connected. So to clarify this statement, he quietly asked, "What?"

"I'm sorry, Kakashi-san, but I have not the time to explain myself to you – nor would I wish to do so. Now, if you please—"

The Jounin's stare turned into a glower. "Are you in such a hurry to leave us so soon, Rin-chan?" he hissed from behind his mask.

The girl's expression remained stoic. "If I am, then it is my own business. I hold no ties to Konoha."

Kakashi was about to retort, but his door slammed open for the second time today –Tsunade's strength managing to blow it off the hinges. "Rin, so help me God – I'm going to put you in the _mental ward_ if you try to pull that shit again!" seethed the Hokage.

Rin threw Kakashi a look that said "thanks", then straightened to face a furious Tsunade. "My apologies, Hokage-sama. I am grateful for your concern and attempts to 'heal' me, but I believe that I am quite capable of taking care of myself at this point. If I might take my leave—"

"You think you're..._leaving_?" Tsunade smirked, her eye twitching in utter rage. "First, I think we need to know what exactly you've been _doing_ all this time. Second, I am quite curious as to what your new jutsu are."

Rin's eyes were cold and calculating – Kakashi was left speechless by her icy new persona. Perhaps she had been better off forgetting...all this. "I have no intent of ever sharing such a curse with anyone else."

Curse? The Jounin rubbed his eye tiredly. This jutsu she'd created...what kind of toll had it taken on her? His bitter anger was fading into concern. What a nightmare this was truly turning out to be. He was still waiting to wake up, but it seemed that the gods weren't quite so merciful as that.

"Then I suppose we'll just have to bear it. I suggest you remember your place here, Rin. Or have you also forgotten that you are a kunoichi of Konoha?"

She smirked sardonically. "I hold no ties with this village any longer. The old Rin died eleven years ago I believe."

Tsunade's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Sorry, but I say that's bullshit. Izumo! Kotetsu!"

"Yes, Hokage-sama!" they cried in unison.

"Take this girl to the Psychiatric Ward – observation unit. And I want her hands bound so there will be no chance of performing any special little jutsu," she added.

"Of course, Hokage-sama!"

Rin stood rigidly as they approached and took a hold of her hands. There was no fight. The Jounin wondered if perhaps she knew that this was an inevitable defeat she was facing – a losing battle with no hope for victory. Rin always had been one to calculate these sorts of things, hadn't she? The girl must know that Tsunade would get what she wanted one way or the other. To resist would be a pointless waste of energy, and Rin was the farthest thing from stupid. Kakashi couldn't remember a time when she'd squander her precious chakra on anything – every jutsu was cautiously considered and calculated before any action was taken. How annoying that had been.

The elite Chuunin led Rin out the door, while Tsunade observed with a watchful eye. The silver-haired man sighed heavily and watched them go. "Rin-chan..." he murmured absently as they disappeared from view. The Hokage shot him an angry glare, though he knew she didn't really blame him for anything. Seeing what had once been such a warm, loving girl turn into a cold, bitter woman...a bitter woman who'd gone so far as to erase her own memories...it was hard on all of them, but it seemed Kakashi was taking it the hardest.

"What did she say to you?"

He continued to stare down at his blanket, unable to reply. What _had_ she said to him? It was such a blur now... "She wanted...she wanted to see Obito."

Tsunade crossed her arms. "Obito? As in your left eye?"

"I suppose. I can't imagine what else she'd have meant."

"Anything else?"

Damnit. Was she _trying_ to rub it in his face? "No. That was it..."

There was a long pause before a soft "I'm sorry, Kakashi" was offered. "I know this is hard for you, but we're trying. We really are. I'm going to go down right now and try to talk some sense into her, alright?"

He nodded disinterestedly. Like trying to "reason" with Rin would do any good. She was stubborn, just like Obito had been. There would be no reckoning with her. Not now. Not ever. She wouldn't change. She wouldn't go back to being _his_ Rin - the Rin that had died eleven years prior. No. It seemed that his Rin really had died after all, hadn't she?

"Whatever you deem best, Hokage-sama," he told her. "It seems that Rin-chan isn't the Rin-chan I'd hoped to find again. She's not..."

Tsunade raised an eyebrow as he trailed off. "Kakashi, listen to me. You can't give up on her so easily, can you? You're so close to finding her again – your Rin. The Rin you loved." He snapped his good eye up to meet hers in response, earning him a soft chuckle from the old woman. "Yes, yes. Don't try to deny it."

Kakashi slowly looked away again in silence.

The Godaime nodded and turned to go. "Promise me you'll try harder. Alright?"

"Of course, Hokage-sama."

"Good. I'll let you know if anything comes up."

"...Thanks. I appreciate it."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Days passed by as leaves in the wind. How long had he been laying here? Surely he was well enough to be discharged by now.

The Jounin stared blankly at page 93 of _Icha Icha Takutikusu_. This would be the ninth time reading through it (today), and frankly – one could only handle so much porn. _"Wait..."_ he thought disbelievingly. _"Did that really just come out of my head?...Couldn't be..."_

He tried to focus on the novel once more, but somehow his thoughts kept reverting back to what had happened just a week earlier. The way Rin had spoken...

"Stop it," he told himself. "It won't do any good thinking about it." But oh, how he _did_ think about it! Kakashi was sure he'd go insane sooner or later. And why hadn't Tsunade given him any updates? Was Rin really _that_ hard-hearted? The Hatake did have to admire her willpower though. To resist interrogation for that long...truthfully, it was quite amazing. He just wished she'd realize that _they_ weren't her enemy.

Perhaps he'd go visit her...just for a little while. Just to make sure she was okay. That was all.

Kakashi slowly rose from the bed, deciding to leave the crutches behind for now (he could manage without them), and walked out into the hall. A passing nurse gave him a small nod, but remained otherwise uncommunicative. He was rather grateful for this. The Jounin ran a hand through his silver mane, eying the long flight of stairs with a wary eye. It was during this time that Kakashi cursed the fact that there were no elevators in this God-forsaken building.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Hatake-san? What are you doing here?"

The Jounin ignored the nurse as he pressed a hand to one of the large, one-way glass walls surrounding his former friend. No privacy at all for...how long? This was torture in and of itself. Kakashi noticed how tired Rin looked. She was probably suffering from self-induced insomnia of some sort. "Can I go in?"

The nurse raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Uh, um...well..."

"She was my teammate...Please. I just want to talk to her for a bit. Is that alright?" He gave the medic nin a sorrowful look, practically begging to go in.

She only sighed and muttered something about "Tsunade's gonna kill me for this". Perfect. He watched the nurse enter a code for the lock which beeped a few times before a green light flashed. "Go on in..." she huffed.

"Thanks."

"Yeah, yeah..."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

It was so cold in here...

Kakashi wondered if Tsunade was trying to break Rin both physically and mentally now. He supposed that the whole "reasoning" approach hadn't worked. Damn – he could even see his breath! But why couldn't he see hers? Unless...

"Rin-chan!" The Jounin was at her side in an instant, one hand latched onto her trembling shoulder. Her eyes were only half-open and her breathing was shallow and weak. It was definitely hypothermia. Why? _Why_ wouldn't she just tell them what had happened? Why was she putting herself through this?!

"K-Kakashi-san..." she whispered numbly. "I...it's...chilly in here...isn't it?" He could see her smirk faintly.

"Rin-chan..." Kakashi noticed how tightly her hands had been bound – the cords were engraving ugly marks into her soft flesh. He lifted his head and looked around this box, because that's what it was – a box. A box devoid of any comfort or commodity. Hell, there was absolutely nothing in here...except for Rin. "Are you cold?" he asked her quietly.

The girl shook her head – she hated being a burden to anyone. But Kakashi had expected this, for he'd known her too long and knew her too well. "Of course not," he said gently, putting his arms around her. Rin was surprised, needless to say, but was also too drained to fight him. It would be futile anyways – she'd always lost against Kakashi.

The Jounin tried to warm her up a little by rubbing his hands up and down her trembling arms. "Rin-chan, are you eating well?" She felt thinner than he remembered her to be.

"I don't...have much appetite..." The girl jadedly sunk into his embrace with a burdened sigh. How weak she was to resign herself so easily... Kakashi muttered curses underneath his mask, earning himself a feeble smile from Rin. "Please don't worry...I...it's my fault..."

"What's your fault?" he inquired hesitantly, half-knowing what her answer would be.

"Everything...everything's my fault..." Rin looked up at his hitai-ate, wondering if her handiwork had held up after all these years. "Obito-kun might...he might still..."

He shushed her with one hand, not wanting to hear these guilt-ridden laments yet again. Kakashi was almost sure it'd break his heart. "Rin-chan, no. It wasn't your fault. Please stop blaming yourself for his death."

The man staggered at _her_ surprise, which slowly turned into a weary grief. "No, Kakashi-san...you're wrong," she whispered into his arm. "Obito-kun and I are very close...yes, I saw him not too long ago..."

Delusional. Rin was delusional. The Jounin winced at her claims – Rin still thought Obito was alive? How was he going to explain this to her? She couldn't have forgotten the "incident", could she? His thoughts were interrupted by a soft whimper coming from the certain body he held. She was crying...

"Please, Rin – don't cry..." he begged. "_Please_ don't, Rin."

"Kakashi-san...I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all of this. I told Obito-kun how sorry I was, but he always tells me that I couldn't have helped it. That it wasn't my fault..." Rin shifted herself so that she could bury her face in his sleeve, her tears falling faster. "But it _is_...and I wish everyone would stop telling me it isn't..."

"Rin-chan..." he mumbled miserably. The thin material hiding his face ensured that she couldn't see his pain. His pain that she was responsible for. Did Rin know how much she was hurting him right now? Could she begin to fathom how much heartache he'd suffered because of her? How many times he'd wanted to cry because of _her_ tears? "Stop it, Rin," he choked. "How many times do I have to tell you?"

Her hands clutched his arm tighter, signaling that maybe now wasn't the best time for a lecture. However, he didn't care. Rin needed to hear this. Once and for all, she needed to know that the burden wasn't hers to bear.

"Obito wouldn't want you to do this to yourself – what would he think if he were still here?"

Her dull brown eyes lifted to meet his, the momentary flash of indignation showing itself for but an instant. "I told you – he's _not_ dead! Obito-kun brought me here. You saw him yourself! In fact, you even _attacked_ him!"

What? Kakashi was shocked speechless for a moment. What did she say? "No...that was..."

"'Tobi-kun' is what I called him then, but...wasn't it obvious to you?" she asked incredulously, disbelieving that Kakashi really hadn't recognized their old comrade.

"Rin, no. You must be mistaken..." he protested weakly.

The girl pulled away from him, hurt that he doubted her. "You think I'm insane...that I'm delusional. Isn't that right?"

Yes, but he wasn't about to tell her that. "Of course not—"

"Stop lying, Hatake. You were never any good at it..." she muttered in disgust. "Obito-kun promised he'd come for me. Maybe when you see him yourself you'll believe what I said...Obito-kun will let me forget..."

Though she'd only murmured that last part, Kakashi's sharp ears picked up on it. "'Let you _forget'_?" he repeated harshly. "What's that's supposed to mean?"

Rin glared defiantly at her former teammate, her former "commander". "Do you really think I enjoy living like this?" she spat disdainfully. "Do you really believe that I wake up everyday with a smile on my face? It's Hell that I live in, Kakashi-san. You have no idea how many times I sat there, staring at that damn kunai...pondering how I should do it." She smiled faintly, a hint of madness playing upon her features. "The wrists? Or perhaps my throat? The femoral artery maybe?"

He stared at her in horror, his true eye wide in a panicked expression. "Stop it!" came the Jounin's demand.

But she ignored it. "And now, knowing that Obito-kun's life was ruined...that he can never show his face...that I destroyed his body..." Rin's eyes were growing wilder with every passing second, her voice more frenzied with every word. "I only _wish_ I had a kunai to make it all just go away."

"Rin! You're not thinking straight. You must rationa—"

"Shall I bite my tongue?!" she cried suddenly. "Or shall they watch me beat my head in against these God-forsaken mirrors? What do _you_ think, '_Kashi_-_kun_? I've always valued your opinion so highly after all..."

Kakashi shied at the old moniker. He could taste her bitterness, and frankly - it was rather nauseating. His head started to spin slightly at the idea of her committing suicide yet again (and in such horrible fashions). "Why are you doing this? If you want to die so badly, why didn't you just go through with it the first time!? Why do you insist on putting me through this _again_?" he growled.

The girl narrowed her glassy eyes at him. "Because, I was sick of it. I was always too scared to end it once and for all...I wanted to try something else first."

"What was that? Erasing your memories?!" he cried. "That's pure _bullshit_, Rin! You and I both know it!"

Angry tears coursed down her ink-stained cheeks as she viciously retorted, "Maybe it is...but at least then, I could have a chance to be happy again. I could be the girl I used to be...the girl Obito loved, and not just an empty shell..."

Kakashi watched Rin's hysteria fade into despair - watched her slowly die right before his eyes. So...she had done this for Obito? She had left the village, staged her suicide, and erased her memories...all for him? Kakashi tried to ignore the next question, but it insisted on being asked. "Did you...love...Obito?" he asked brokenly.

Rin only stared at her knees, her silence providing enough of an answer. "I see..." The Hatake rose shakily to his feet, then cleared his throat. "Tell me how you did it." His voice had dropped to sub-artic temperatures; his eye had resumed its customary aloof and lazy expression. It was his second mask...the one he used to hide away all those troublesome emotions.

"So, you're interrogating me too? You always were such a cold bastard..."

Her remark cut deep – deeper than any kunai that had run across his flesh. And since when had she taken up profanity? Kakashi merely stared blankly at the girl. "Please tell me what jutsu you used. Rin, I will not ask kindly a third time."

"Untie me, and I'll tell you." Her eyes were nearly as cold as his was. The Jounin wished it hadn't come to this...now he was just making himself out to be the enemy. It had been the last thing he'd wanted.

"I'm afraid I can't do that."

"Then you can go to Hell, Hatake. But please, take me with you..." she mocked. It didn't last long. Her defiance disappeared as soon as he reached for the hitai-ate covering Obito. Rin shut her eyes and turned her head away from him. "Don't you dare. Don't you _dare_ do that to me!" she hissed.

"Look at me."

"Forget it."

"**Look at me!**" Rin obeyed with great reluctance, her dull brown eyes sorrowful and despairing as they met both Kakashi's eyes for the first time in years. The Jounin was certain that something inside had broken...something inside _him_, that is. To do this to Rin, to his Rin-chan. Why? He swallowed nervously, the Sharingan tearing into her like the teeth of an angry dog. "Tell me what you did."

The girl was trembling violently, her tremors a terrible result of her terror. He watched the tears dry up, and watched her soul retract into the darkest depths of her being. "Obito-kun..." she pleaded hoarsely, falling under his curse. "Please don't do this..."

"_**Tell**_** me what you did!**"

Rin winced as if he'd just slapped her across the face – the pain was evident in her voice as she replied, "I'm sorry, Obito-kun...I'm still weak...aren't I?"

What was she ranting about now? Kakashi had pushed aside all feelings of pity or affection – he would get what he wanted out of Rin one way or the other...even if it meant breaking both of them in the process. "**What jutsu did you use?**" he demanded coldly.

"I created two of them...the first staged my death. The second relieved my pain," Rin's eyes softened as they stared into Kakashi's blood-red iris. "Which would you like to hear about first?"

"It matters not."

Rin smiled sorrowfully. "There is a legend...you must have heard it, yes? Creatures...beautiful spirits – pure as snow...who can bring the dead back to life."

"Go on."

"I named it after them..." she murmured. "'_Yōsei'._"

Rin went on to explain that the user can essentially "die", but be reborn in an almost unharmed state only a few hours after said death. It took almost three hundred hand-seals to perform, making it extremely difficult (if not impossible for any other) to pull off properly. Kakashi was astounded as she continued. The user could freeze their flow of chakra and quell all signs of life, making it appear as if they'd died when, in fact, they'd only entered a comatose state. Once the chakra flow was restored, all self-inflicted wounds will heal at an accelerated rate, and the user would be provided with a short burst of energy allowing for escape if need be. She had invented this jutsu with her extensive medicinal knowledge and high intelligence levels. It took almost an entire year to perfect it, but Rin was able to successfully perform the jutsu, making it appear as if she'd committed suicide. Making it appear as if she'd died.

It took a moment to fathom this revelation. Kakashi didn't know what to say to her, but Rin ensured he could remain unspoken. "But my favorite..." she told him quietly, "is the _Senbazuru no Jutsu_. You know how it works. You've seen it done twice already Obito-kun..."

"Tell me again," the Jounin requested gruffly, trying to hide the fact he wanted to scream. Trying to hide that he could hardly stand being mistaken for Obito. What was he doing to her? When had he given up the last shreds of his humanity?

"Of course, Obito-kun," she murmured dazedly. "There are only thirty-five hand seals, all of which I'll show you once I'm free. All I do is redirect the chakra flow in my body, focusing it around the brain – specifically in the hippocampus which is where the creation of memory begins." There was a long pause, making Kakashi wonder what else there was to this jutsu.

"...and?"

"I don't want you to tell him..."

"Tell who?"

"...Kakashi..._please_ don't tell him, Obito-kun. He'll be furious."

The man's injured stare made her wince. "I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?"

"No..." Kakashi breathed. "But I promise I won't tell."

Rin smiled – it was a true smile, but sad. It was almost enough to break his heart all over again. "Thank you," she whispered before continuing on. "There are side effects to my jutsu, as I told you last time...My memories will be erased for 1,000 days – 32 weeks or almost three years, but...in return for this relief...my life is shortened."

The Jounin stopped breathing. He seemed to be having a problem with this of late...but that was something to worry about later. "W-What?" he gasped hoarsely.

"Why are you so surprised, Obito-kun? You've known about this for a while. In fact, you promised to bring me back here to say goodbye."

"Goodbye?"

"Yes, to Minato-sensei and Kakashi-san. I wanted to tell him something before...before..." Rin trailed off uneasily, her eyes shifting to the floor in embarrassment.

"Before what?" Kakashi prodded, desperate to hear this. "Before _what_, Rin?!"

"Before I die, Obito-kun..." Her confused gaze was both terrible and tragic. He had to break the trance before she saw Obito cry. He heard her voice change as she returned to addressing Hatake Kakashi instead of Uchiha Obito. "He told me he'd bury me in the mountains, underneath the snow...I've always loved the snow, but you knew that. Didn't you, Kakashi?"

"Stop it, Rin."

"What? Why? I'm only telling you what you wanted to know..."

He snapped his gaze back to hers. "Why would you use such a technique? It's killing you, Rin! How many times have you used it already?" he demanded.

The girl smirked dryly. "Guess."

That meant (he began counting in his head) about four times already. "How many years have you sacrificed?"

"It takes _so_ much chakra to suppress all those thoughts...those memories..."

Kakashi grabbed her by the shoulders and forced her to look at him. "Damnit! Just _tell_ me, Rin!" he hissed.

"For 1,000 days of freedom, I readily give 1,000 weeks of my life." There were tears forming at the corners of her eyes now. Kakashi could only stare weakly into those once-beautiful irises. His mind was reeling. One thousand weeks...that was just about nineteen years. Multiply that by four...

"Seventy...six..." The Jounin released her and staggered over to a mirrored wall – groping for some kind of support. He wanted to vomit. Wanted to scream. Wanted to _kill_ something. "You've given up seventy-six years..."

"The next time I forget...I can finally die in peace..." she told him brokenly. "I'll see Minato-sensei again. And my family, I'll see my family...I'll say hello to Sakumo-san for you too, if you'd like..."

"Shut-up, Rin..." he whispered. "Just shut up. I don't want to hear this."

The girl scoffed. "The moment you took off that hitai-ate, you _inherited_ this. You asked me to tell you, so I told you. Now bear it like Obito did."

Bear it like Obito did? That's right. Everything was all about Obito. True – Kakashi had yearned to see his old friend for so long...but right now, he was furious at the Uchiha. How could he know about Rin's jutsu and still allow her to perform it?! Did he care anything about the girl at all? It was worse than handing her a knife with which to slit her throat. And after she'd done all this for _him_? For _his_ sake? He was just going to let her _die_?! Kakashi would have none of it.

"Obito is dead to me," announced the silver-haired man coldly. "And your 'Tobi' will die by my hands. I'll make sure of it."

Rin's eyes darkened, but she was otherwise expressionless. "I did have something to tell you...but..." The girl shook her head slowly – pain seeping onto the floor, filling the room...drowning them in sorrow. "It seems I've forgotten it," she said quietly. "You're not the Kakashi I remember...I could never have loved something so despicable as you."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

**Hello to all and 'sanku so much for the reviews!!**

**ami****: Hehe, agreed. I like Rin more than Sakura too. Sorry to all you Sakura-fans out there. Don't get me wrong, she's still one of my favorites...but Rin's just a little better. ;)**

**SongoftheDarquePhoenix****: I know...I'm so mean to the guy. And thanks!**

**Sakra-chan****: Ooh, 'sanku! It's very much appreciated. And my understanding of a beta is someone who just reviews the story, spell-checks it, and determines if it's following the plot so far/making sense. So how shall we do this? Do you have your messaging enabled? And yes…it is rather depressing, isn't it? **

**Sanctus Espiritus****: Thanks! )**

**Eldr-Fire****: Hehe, no worries. I'm alright with it now actually. See, I'm a pretty fickle person, so…yesh. And thank you – your comments are very encouraging! **

**Other than that…I don't really know what to say!**** So, I'm off until next time. **

**- Hikari**


	5. No More Tears to Cry

**Chapter 5****: No More Tears to Cry**

Biting.

Tearing.

Clawing.

"_I could never have loved..."_

"Don't," he groaned aloud.

"_...something so despicable as you..."_

Hatake Kakashi stood numbly before Yamikaze Minato and the heroes of Konoha – he stood before the many ghosts of his past...the ones that he knew to be dead. He rubbed his forehead tiredly, wondering who else was going to rise from the grave. Hell, the way things were going, Minato-sensei would waltz right into town any minute now, announcing he'd only taken a little vacation with his darling Kushina.

"_...despicable..."_

"Please...stop..." he pleaded quietly, but Kakashi knew he deserved those words. He had turned against Rin in her darkest hours. He truly was despicable.

The Jounin tried forgetting what had happened mere moments later, but...it was too fresh. The blood was too fresh to be forgotten so quickly. It was too fresh to merely wash away.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"_You...what?" he murmured, his once-firm voice now barely audible. _

_Rin's indifferent gaze seemed to tear right into his soul – ripping, biting, clawing at every hint of weakness it caught sight of. "Please. You must have known," she told him caustically. "I'd always been head-over-heels for you, but it was meaningless. Every girl in Konoha felt the same way...but after Obito-kun...I changed. The feelings I had became more than just..." The girl broke away from his stare. "You said you'd protect me, and I believed you. I just...I guess I..." _

_Kakashi's eyes fell. He couldn't be hearing this. It was worse than hearing her contemplations on suicide. _

"_Kakashi-san, I'd always admired you. You were a genius - so much stronger, faster, smarter...so much more than I could ever hope to become." Rin's broken smile gave her a ghost-like countenance; it would relentlessly haunt him for years. "But Obito-kun - I should have noticed him. He was the one I truly should have admired...he loved me. Even when I was so...__**selfish**__. Even when I was blind to what love really was." _

_The Jounin felt something running down the left side of his face. Damnit, it seemed Obito hadn't been able to hold back any longer. The man turned away from Rin so she wouldn't see his tears. No, wait. These weren't his tears. That's right...they were Obito's. _

"_Even when he found me again...I can't. I can't do it. I've been trying and trying...but all I see is Obito-kun laying there...crushed...broken...I can't see anything else..." Rin shook her head slowly, hair falling into her face to hide the soulless eyes. "You probably wouldn't remember, but I stopped. After we returned from Rock, I stopped pestering you. I could hardly __**look**__ at you, because all I'd see was Obito-kun. Wouldn't it be ridiculous if they saw me – crying at the sight of my teammate?"_

_Kakashi shook his head "no". It wouldn't be ridiculous. He'd wanted to weep too, but the same fear of ridicule that had plagued Rin had also troubled him. He wouldn't be taken as weak. He couldn't. So he'd turned away from her as she'd done to him. _

"_**I**__ thought so..." she murmured. "That's why I couldn't - I didn't look at you. You went about your business, and I went about mine. It was less painful that way I thought."_

"_Yes..." he agreed quietly. "I felt that way too." _

"_And Minato-sensei - he had more important things to worry over...like overseeing Konoha's affairs. I was so proud of him. I felt so privileged to be a student of the Hokage's." Rin sniffed, making Kakashi wonder if she'd begun to cry again, yet he couldn't bring himself to confirm the suspicion. "I thought that the wounds might heal, slowly, given the proper amount of time. But they didn't, Kakashi-san... Do you know? Do you know what it's like to cry yourself to sleep every night? Do you know what it's like to run out of tears? To find your pillow blotted red every morning because you've begun to cry blood? To find you've started to weep your heart away?"_

_The Jounin grimaced, his entire body tensing – fighting to remain level-headed. He clenched his fists, knuckles turning a ghastly white. She'd cried blood? Is that why she'd arrive for training with red eyes every morning? It hadn't been just a lack of sleep? Of course. Why hadn't he noticed this before? If he'd only taken the time to ask her...if he'd taken the time to care...but Kakashi had only turned away in revulsion. He wouldn't even look at her. He thought she was weak. Unable to control her childish emotions._

_And so Rin's soul had slowly bled away. Night after night. _

_Drop._

_By. _

_Drop._

"_It hurt...but I couldn't stop. Minato-sensei forced me to see Tsunade-sama. You must remember that, right? You lectured me on how I should take better care of myself, but it's alright," she added quickly, noticing how the Jounin flinched at this fact. He did remember. _

"_I told Obito I'd watch out for you, but you've got to do your part too, Rin-chan. Stop being so childish and try to be a bit more mature, alright?" That's what he'd said to her. That's what he'd __**fucking**__ said to her..._

"_My eyesight had suffered from the constant strain, but it wasn't anything that couldn't be fixed. I took what you said to heart and tried my best to please you – after all, you'd promised to protect me with your life. It was the least I could do, wasn't it? But you could never be pleased. Nothing I did was ever good enough. No matter how much I improved, how much I changed, it was worthless. I was worthless." Rin's shoulders shuddered involuntarily. He heard the abnormal movement even from several yards away. "I don't hold it against you though. I slowly began to understand how you felt, why you acted so coldly. I became the same way too, though Minato-sensei's death was what changed everything. I was tired...so, so tired of __**feeling**__. I wanted it to just go away. I wanted it to stop."_

"_...So you considered suicide..." whispered the man leaning against the wall. _

_Rin nodded, more hair falling over her face. "But I was scared...I didn't want to die alone." _

_He stole a glance at her, too humiliated and ashamed to fully look at the girl. "You could have—"_

_She laughed, making him jump slightly. Hysteria laced her amusement, making something so beautiful now deformed and ugly. "What?" Rin asked. "Gone to __**you**__? You were nowhere to be found Kakashi-san! The ANBU's lifestyle leaves no room for others. I don't believe I saw you more than once a month, and that was only in passing. You and I...we weren't teammates anymore. We weren't friends...not that we had ever really been friends in the first place. Right? I was just the annoying girl they'd stuck on your team. I was 'unnecessary baggage' as you might have put it back then..."_

"_That's not true!" he objected, whirling to face her. "You were never unnecessary! Never!" _

"_Really?" she asked with noted bleakness. "It must have been my imagination then. I don't believe I was really thinking clearly for much of the time. Forgive me, Kakashi-san. I don't want to blame you for my own shortcomings." _

_Kakashi took a step towards Rin, desperate to tell the girl that she really had mattered, that he really had cared – he just didn't deserve her back then. He still didn't deserve her now. "Rin-chan..." The Jounin reached out to touch her shoulder._

_She recoiled from him as if he'd burned her._

"_No, Rin..." he whispered. His voice was hurt; both eyes were sorrowful and grievous. _

"_How could you..." Kakashi stared at her – her eyes still hidden underneath a mass of russet silk. "How could you do that to me? How could you use that against me?" _

_The Sharingan. She was talking about his Sharingan. "I'm sorry, Rin-chan," he told her. "I'm sorry..."_

"_You aren't the boy I knew. You aren't the same person I admired. What you've done to me..." She lifted her head, blood flowing from her eyes. Yes, blood. Flowing from her eyes. Were these her true tears? Was he hallucinating? "I can never forgive you." _

"_R-Rin—"_

"_If you'd slit my throat, told me I was trash...anything but __**that**__...I could have forgiven you. But to use the Sharingan...the very Sharingan I took from Obito and gave to you...your gift from a dying teammate, no – a dying __**brother**__...how could you?" Her voice was dangerously low, her brown eyes narrowed into mere slits. "You deserve to be forgotten." _

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Kakashi hurriedly wiped at his right eye. "Damn..." he mumbled wretchedly, ashamed to be weeping in front of the dead...those who truly deserved to weep.

"Hatake-san?! _Crying_ no less? Why, this is unheard of!" The voice jolted Kakashi out of his trance. There, not ten yards away, stood a very bold Akatsuki. So, Obito had returned had he?

"You..." the Jounin hissed from beneath his mask. He'd wondered when his teammate would revisit him. "I thought you'd died, _Obito_."

Tobi slapped his forehead. "Aw, man! She _told_ you!? I was hoping to keep it a surprise!"

"Stop playing games with me, Uchiha! How are you still alive?! And why did you join the Akatsuki?"

"Now, now, Hatake-san..." protested the other. "So many questions! And there's no need to get angry. I just came for a little chat, that's all."

Kakashi stood tensely, preparing to fight if need be. "Then..." he began. "What would you like to 'chat' about, old _friend_?" His voice was saturated with scorn.

Tobi shrugged. "How about Rin-chan? I hope you've been treating her well, Hatake-san. She's a very fragile blossom you know." The Akatsuki's friendly tone turned icy in only a few words. "I know she's remembered you by now, and I would appreciate having her returned to me."

"And what makes you think that she wants to be 'returned'?"

"Oh, come now!" Tobi put his hands on his hips. "I've seen her in an awakened state twice already – she isn't...well. Not when she remembers everything..."

The Jounin noted the rather sad tone in his old comrade's voice. Did he still have feelings for Rin? "Perhaps she'll be better if—"

"You promised me."

Kakashi narrowed his good eye. "Excuse me?"

"You promised me you'd protect her, Kakashi. You _fucking_ _promised_!" The man's voice grew angry and dangerous. All politeness was instantly dropped. "I thought I'd left her in good hands, but come to find out – who do I happen upon years later? That's right - I found Rin. And do you know what, Kakashi? Guess how I found her?"

He didn't want to guess. He didn't want to know.

"She was wandering around half dead and without a single _fucking_ memory. She didn't know what her name was. She didn't know where she came from. She was in rags. She was starving. She was...broken..." Tobi pointed an accusing finger at the Jounin. "And you made her like that. You don't know how to protect _anyone_, do you? All you did was hurt her."

Kakashi felt weak. Wasn't he the one supposed to be questioning Obito? Wasn't Kakashi supposed to be accusing _Obito_ of damaging Rin? "No...I..."

"Rin-chan will come with me. _I_ won't let her past plague her, because I'm not as selfish as you are."

"So you'll let her _die_?!" cried the other, fury overtaking the man and giving him a sudden (though debatable) clarity of mind. "She staged suicide for your sake! She forgot everything for _you_! Now you'll just sit back and watch as she kills herself!?"

Tobi chuckled. Was it sorrowfully? Did he (God forbid) _pity_ Kakashi? "She said that? And you..._believed_ her? I thought you were smarter than that. It seems time really has taken its toll on you, Hatake-san."

Said Hatake froze. "W-What...what did you say?"

"You honestly think she did _all_ of it for me? True, some of it might have been for my sake, and I wish with all my heart that she hadn't done it. But..." Kakashi was sure the Akatsuki was smiling behind his mask. "You were the one who did this to her. She _would_ have healed. She would have become our Rin-chan again if you'd _protected_ her like I asked you to. Regrettably though, you failed at it." Tobi shaded his one eye. "So, let me take her away. She's said her goodbyes? Told you what she wanted to tell you?"

Kakashi stared hard at the ground. Shame was spilling everywhere, dirtying the nice clean grass.

Tobi duly noted this. "What. Have. You. **Done**?" he demanded darkly.

"The gift...I used it..." The Jounin touched his hitai-ate. "I made her tell me everything."

"Bastard!"

He nodded sullenly in agreement. He was a bastard.

"This is what I was talking about. Even now...even now, you only bring her more pain. She loved you. She _loved_ you!" Tobi's voice was thick. Kakashi thought he might be crying underneath that fiery orange mask.

"I'm sorry..." whispered the Jounin. "I don't know what to do now."

"Beg her forgiveness. Get down on your knees and beg like the fucking _dog_ you are!!" the Akatsuki demanded hoarsely. "Goddamnit, Kakashi – I swear to God, I'll kill you. I'll fucking kill you if she's worse off than before. Do you know how she begged? Do you know how badly she wanted to see you before...before..." Tobi had to turn away.

Kakashi was wallowing in misery. Why did everything hurt so badly? Was it because he realized how much of a disgrace he was? Was it because he'd realized how much Rin had cared for him? He clutched at his chest, pulling at the cloth covering his heart. Something was stabbing him there, though he knew not what.

"I'll come for her in one day."

He slowly lifted his good eye to meet Obito's.

"That's all you've got to make things right. I want her to be happy at the end. I want these last memories to be good ones." Tobi held up his right forefinger ominously. "You have one day." A sudden gust of wind rushed through the clearing – making Kakashi wince, and when he opened his eye again...Tobi was gone.

"One day..." a voice echoed eerily. "...That's all you get..."

Kakashi nodded. Yes. Of course. He would beg. He would beg her forgiveness. He would make things right with her. And before it was too late...

He'd tell her he loved her.

It was the least he could do now. After all these years of denying his poor Rin-chan, Kakashi would finally tell her what he'd ached to tell her. What she'd ached to hear.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Hokage-sama, please!" he almost shouted. "I need to see her!"

Tsunade crossed her arms irritably. "Like hell I'll let you see her!" she retorted. "Do you have any idea of what you've _done_ to her?! She refused to so much as speak after your little 'interrogation'!"

"Please, Tsunade..." he pleaded, casting aside all formalities now. "I have to...She's dying."

The Godaime only stared coldly at the man. "Yes, I know. We've got her entire 'confession' on tape thanks to your Sharingan. _Damnit_, Kakashi! That was so...stupid!"

The Jounin sighed heavily, pocketing his hands. "I know," was all he said.

"You overreacted out of envy. It was right after she told you she did it for that Uchiha. I thought you were more level-headed than that, Hatake..."

He knew he should be listening to this, but frankly – Kakashi's mind was wandering over to more important matters. He'd see Rin one way or the other, even if Tsunade refused to let him into her room. Yes, they'd moved Rin for a third time – back to the ICU. She was strapped to a bed, put on ventilators, and fed through a tube in her side. They weren't about to let her die on them so easily. The silver-haired man had watched scores of doctors enter and exit the room, shaking their heads in disbelief.

"It's truly amazing..." he heard one say. "To think that someone so young could create such a devastating technique."

"Yes," replied his assistant. "But I wonder...perhaps if it were revised..."

The first turned to her eagerly. His eyes were greedy and filled with an arrogant desire...sickening. "You mean – if we were able to remove the aftereffects..."

"It might be used on battle-worn shinobi!" she finished. "Think of the possibilities, Doctor! All the emotional trauma – we could free them from all of that!"

Kakashi stopped listening at that point. It was making him nauseous to hear them talk about shinobi like this...hear them talk about using Rin in such a disgusting fashion. He'd have none of it.

"..._listening_ to me?!!?"

Her screech jolted him back to the present. "Eh, sorry. I..."

"Yada, yada," she snapped. "Fine. See Rin, but don't you dare touch her! Got it?"

"Of course, Hokage-sama. You have my word."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Well...here he was. Kakashi stood at the foot of Rin's bed, observing her with a quiet vigilance. She was asleep now – though, "asleep" wasn't really the proper word for it. Tsunade had pumped her so full of sedatives, the Jounin was sure the poor girl had entered more of a comatose state than she had a restful sleep.

He noted the various equipment surrounding the bed – all of it attached to her in one way or another. The ugly machines forcing Rin to live couldn't mar that gentle beauty of hers though. She'd always been so pretty, especially when she slept. At least Kakashi thought so. He wished he'd have told her that before all of this happened. The Jounin knew she would have liked that. She would have liked that a lot. He walked over to Rin's side now.

Quietly, and against Tsunade's order, the man reached out to touch one of her tattoos. He'd always wondered where she'd gotten those – was she inked during childhood? Or perhaps these were a family trait...a birthmark of sorts? He might never know.

The machine behind him started beeping loudly, causing the man to turn and see what was wrong. It seemed her heart rate was increasing abnormally fast. Several nurses rushed in, ordering him to "move aside". Kakashi did so worriedly, anxious to know what was going on. Several tense moments and injections later, Rin was back to normal. Well, as normal as she could be right now.

"Nightmares," one nurse explained. "She has them every half-hour or so. Poor thing used to wail so loudly and cry...we had to feed her more sedatives to put her easy again." She sighed. "Sad thing is that it hasn't helped. But, at least she doesn't cry anymore."

"Yes, at least she doesn't cry..." he mumbled in misery. "Will she wake up anytime soon?"

The nurse shook her head. "We're afraid that she might try to do _something_. Her fingers were taped, but we don't know if she'll make an attempt at suicide...I'm sorry."

He nodded. She left. So Rin wouldn't be waking up on her own then? Kakashi looked at the clock - seventeen hours left. Not much time at all really. Of course, he could always try fighting Obito off, but something inside said that it'd be all wrong. Obito was still Obito...and he still cared for Rin. That made Kakashi hate him a little less.

He reached out and carefully took a hold of her hand with his own. The silver-haired Jounin smiled a little when he felt the girl unconsciously tighten her grip around it, almost bidding him to stay with her. Kakashi nodded. "I'll stay with you, Rin-chan. Don't worry."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Fourteen hours.

Time was running out. The man hadn't let go of her for three hours now, but frankly – holding her hand and sitting here didn't technically "make things right". He had to do something.

The Hatake glanced over at the array of machinery, trying to decide which one was keeping her asleep. Aha. That one. Just as he was reaching to flip the switch, who should walk in but a very shocked and soon-to-be-angry Tsunade?

"_Of course. Just my luck..."_ he muttered silently as she stormed over.

"What did I tell you?!" she hissed at the man. Kakashi only stared sorrowfully at the Hokage in response, not sure whether or not he should tell her about Obito and his little "demand". Tsunade didn't lighten up in the least bit.

"Hokage-sama. Please. I want...I need to tell her something."

"Like what?" the blonde demanded, folding her arms. "What exactly do you have to tell her, Hatake?"

The Jounin returned his gaze to Rin's troubled face; her brow was furrowed as she fought off an unseen phantasm from her past. The sheen of sweat across her forehead told them that this was a particularly wicked nightmare. "I want her forgiveness," he said quietly. "And..."

Tsunade held up her hand, signaling he needn't continue. "Kakashi-san, I understand, but..."

"I'm running out of time!" he croaked hoarsely. "Please, Hokage-sama!"

She noted his desperation, her own brown eyes softening for a moment. Perhaps she remembered her own love, dying while she could only stand by and watch? The older woman glanced over to Rin, analyzing every aspect of her condition – trying to determine whether or not she should grant Kakashi this request. "If we shut it off now...she should be awake by tomorrow morning."

Kakashi's lone eye widened. "Tomorrow...morning..." he repeated, not sure if he'd heard her right. "Why so long?"

"The sedatives we used have saturated her entire system – the blood cells are practically caked with the stuff. It'll take a while to wear off, but be thankful. For anyone else, I'd have flat out refused, Hatake."

The man nodded. "I'm truly grateful, Hokage-sama...but is there any way to cleanse her system faster?"

Tsunade raised an eyebrow warily. "No, there isn't. Why are you in such a rush anyways?"

He blinked a few times, frantically formulating a feasible lie, but it was in vain. Kakashi was drawing blanks. "I'm just anxious, that's all," he replied lamely.

The Godaime nodded, said a few parting words, then left the pair alone after switching the machine off. The Jounin watched her go for a moment, before turning back to Rin. "Now..." he whispered. "All we can do is wait."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

'**Sanku to all you lovely reviewers out there! ;D**

**Sakra-chan****: alrighteh...I'm so confused about messaging. I have no idea how it works on here (couldn't find an inbox). Anyways, thanks for offering though. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy to know someone cares. And...I was nearly brought to tears after reading your review. I don't think my head can really get any bigger. Thank you so much for your kind words, and I just hope I can live up to them! **

**Eldr-Fire****: I'm glad you're so...touched by it? Maybe? Anywho, I hope I can keep up that general mood – sad, yet intriguing...I think. "**

**Mojo817****: Four reviews all at once!? I'm so thankful for every one – thanks for your input and yes. I laughed quiet a lot at the second one. I think I'd just like to believe that Kakashi isn't quite so perverted as Kishimoto insinuates. xD**

**edlovesjuicyfruit7****: Awww...thank you!! That was really nice of you. Also, I'm glad I could give you another insight into Kakashi. Everyone seems to think he's just a carefree, lazy-ass pervert, but I say otherwise. I mean c'mon. He had a pretty sad childhood – there's definitely scars. Also, I say you're a pretty good author yourself! I took a peek at your story, and you're very good with words. Don't undermine yourself! ;)**

**Anyways, I think that's about it. So will Rin wake up before Obito returns? Even I don't know (...or do I?). That's why I'm off now to write the next chapter! So until then...**

**- Hikari**


	6. Promise Me

**Chapter 6****: Promise Me**

Kakashi never meant to fall in love with her.

It was something he'd always regretted – all it had ever done was bring them misery. The Jounin couldn't remember exactly how it had happened, or when he'd even warmed up to the girl. What he did remember though, was when he first realized she was much more to him than just a "teammate". Ah yes, it was then wasn't it? That time so long ago...

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Kakashi-san," she'd said, her small voice nearly lost in that frightful din. They'd taken a humiliating D-rank mission this time, trying to make-up for funds squandered on meaningless supplies bought in the middle of their last exploit. Food, clothing, hygienic commodities...these things ranked highest on Kakashi's list of "worthless items". Shinobi shouldn't care if their physical conditions were shoddy – at least, not when they were on a mission. It seemed they'd spent a bit too much on frivolities this time, and now were forced to assist nurses at Konoha Hospital as consequence. Rin knew what she was doing though. Kakashi didn't.

"What!?" he snapped viciously, tensions running high. This was stupid. Why was he – a prodigy child – performing such meaningless tasks when he should be out _there_? Helping. Fighting. Killing. All for Konohagakure and the honor of his village.

Rin only reached out and snatched the tray of food from his hands. "You shouldn't be here," she said simply, walking into a patient's room.

"Oh? And why's that?"

The girl paused, then threw him a biting glare – her sepia irises cutting into him like a host of kunai. "You have no idea how to heal people. You'll only do them more damage by being here. Go home."

Kakashi clenched his fists and narrowed his true eye in indignation. The nerve! Who did she think she was? "What did you say?" he hissed dangerously.

Rin ignored him, continuing on her way to deliver lunch to some wounded shinobi. He decided to wait until she reemerged – she wouldn't get away so easily as that. The young Hatake waited...and waited...and waited. Finally, after about fifteen minutes of brooding maliciously in the hall, the boy silently stormed into the room – his dark countenance enough to scare even the toughest of nin. Well, there she was. Just standing there.

"I think you and I need to talk about this, Rin-chan. It was unacceptable and—" He paused, noticing that Rin was still ignoring him. Gah! He wanted to tear his hair out, but only hardened his gaze in response to her aloof behavior. "Fine. If you insist on being so childish then I suppose there's nothing left to talk about." But before he could turn his back and leave, Kakashi received a disturbing surprise.

Her knees buckled suddenly; her entire frame came crashing down onto the cold, tiled floor – a demolished building sinking to the ground in despair. Kakashi only stared in shock as she crumpled into a loose ball. "R-Rin-chan..."

The boy was at her side now, gingerly adjusting her body into his arms. What the hell had just happened? She was fine just a little bit ago. Why had she suddenly crashed like this?

A nurse hurried in, her troubled expression refusing to offer comfort of any sort. It only bred more worry in its wake. "Ah, poor thing!" she exclaimed, bending down to run a hand through Rin's soft brown hair. Kakashi wanted to slap it away, but stoically refrained. "Again? Doesn't she ever learn?"

"Learn what? What's going on here?" he demanded, pulling his teammate closer to him – afraid that something might have happened. Something that he could have prevented.

The nurse only shook her head as she straightened up. "Rin has been here day and night for the past week. Ever since you returned from that last mission of yours, this girl has been here – healing the wounded. It's depleted her entire chakra reserve. If she doesn't stop, she'll die – so please. Talk some sense into her, alright? Please, Hatake-san? She refuses to listen to _us_."

He nodded absently, returning his gaze to Rin's tired face. Upon remembering this whole scene, Kakashi noted that there were, in fact, red splotches near her eyes. They were the horrible marks of her bloody tears, weren't they? The Jounin held her close to him – not exactly knowing why either – until she came to. Rin blinked twice, trying to remember how exactly she'd ended up in Kakashi's arms. Her teammate smiled a little underneath his mask, all irritation and anger diluted into nonexistence. The small amount of time he'd spent worrying over her had made those other feelings seem so trivial and insignificant now. Rin was okay and that's all that mattered.

"Kakashi-san?"

He stared hard at her. "What were you doing?" he asked. "Why'd you just pass out like that?"

"I just wanted to ease his—"

"You're going to kill yourself you know. You need to stop it."

"Stop helping people!?" she cried incredulously. "That's ridiculous!"

"Did I mention, you're _killing_ yourself?" His voice was icy, but it was for her own good. Rin needed to hear this.

However, the girl didn't seem to see things his way. "If I can save just _one_ person using my life as a sacrifice – it'll be enough. I'll be satisfied."

The young Jounin snorted in response. Ridiculous. The very idea of it... He watched Rin shake her head and smile sadly, wondering why. The young girl closed her eyes and (much to his shock) suddenly embraced Kakashi. Her arms wrapped awkwardly around his lanky frame, her nose buried itself into a sensitive crevice between his neck and collar bone. Kakashi squirmed at the sudden touch – it felt so...strange. The only touches he'd known were those meant to kill. But this...this was so much different. It felt so good...he was sure it must be sinful. However, Rin took his movement as disgust and instantly released him. "Sorry, Kakashi-san. I just needed one. Let's keep it a secret 'tween you and me though, ne? " The girl stood up and brushed off her outer robe. Her teammate was still a little speechless – his mouth was unpleasantly dry for some reason. Kakashi was sure she could see him blushing, even underneath that mask of his. Rin smiled again. "Kakashi-san, I know you promised Obito-kun, but..." She took a few steps towards the door. "It can't last forever. There will be a day, a time, a moment that I can't be protected. I don't want you to blame yourself for it, so please. Stop trying so hard now. Alright?"

He turned away. No. He wouldn't accept this – he wouldn't accept that he would fail at protecting her. He'd fail at keeping his promise. "You're wrong," he said. "I will always protect you. No matter what."

She said nothing as she walked out the door, but paused just before disappearing from his sight. "How can you protect something..." she asked, "When all you know is how to destroy it?"

Kakashi then watched her withdraw in silence. What a strange question that was. It didn't have anything to do with whether or not he could protect her, right? But still...he couldn't deny that something about all of this was bothering him. Strange.

The Jounin didn't see Rin at all for several days following. Also strange. Why? Was she purposefully avoiding him? Or perhaps she'd been working her fingers to the bone at the hospital? Either way, he wanted to see her again. This growing feeling of unease was severely compromising his ability to train properly. It had to stop. So, Kakashi decided on stopping by her apartment – if that's what it could really be called. It was more of a room with a shower and toilet thrown into a large closet. He wondered how she could stand the confinement of it all. He was wondering about a lot of things these days actually. It was getting most tiresome to tell the truth.

Rin answered the door, her surprise rather evident in those doe-brown eyes – yet, she only said "Good afternoon, Kakashi-san. I didn't expect to find _you_ at my doorstep. Is there something you need?"

He nodded awkwardly, rather unsure of why he was here himself. "You missed training for the past few days. Are you well?" he asked hurriedly, making up an excuse to be standing here.

His teammate nodded unsurely. She wasn't sure whether or not this was some kind of joke or ridiculous training session. "Eh, yes...I've just been...busy. At the hospital."

Kakashi glared at her. "I thought I told you to stop."

"And I told _you_ that's ridiculous. Now, did you come here to lecture me or was there something _else_ you needed?"

The boy looked away. "No," he said sullenly. "I guess I just don't understand why you insist on doing this. Are you _trying_ to make me break the promise?"

Kakashi instantly regretted those words – her hurt expression was enough to make him inwardly cringe. "No...of course not. I'd never do something so wretched."

"Rin-chan, I'm sorry. Don't take it so harshly. I didn't mean it like that."

She smiled. "Yes, you did. But that's alright I suppose. Kakashi-san, I'm just trying to help people stop hurting. That's all."

"Stop hurting?"

"Yes. Even if I can only help them stop hurting on the outside, at least they can then focus on healing _inside_, right?"

"That's absurd," he scoffed.

Rin nodded. "Perhaps. But I want to believe I can do something, alright? I feel like I'm contributing, if even a little bit, to the war effort. Just let me live in ignorance – just a little while longer. Please, Kakashi-san?"

The Jounin shrugged indifferently, though he knew he was anything _but_ indifferent. "Fine. Whatever..."

Her smile was strangely ominous that night (or so he thought). For some reason, it was almost spectral. "You know, one day I'll find out how to do it."

He raised a silver eyebrow warily. "Do what?" came the suspicious inquiry.

"Fix us, silly!" she laughed lightly, though he could tell it had been forced. "I'll fix us both, ne?"

Kakashi only stared blankly at his teammate. She wanted to...fix him? Why? Was something wrong with him? He hadn't been able to tell. "Fix...us?" he mumbled, his voice lost and a little confused. It was rare that he was at such a loss for words – her proposal had caught him completely off guard this time.

His surprise increased tenfold as Rin smiled a little and reached up to gently lay her hand on his face, her small fingers running across his lips and cheek in a quiet caress. The feather soft touches made him shiver involuntarily – almost like the embrace they'd shared ages ago. "Yes..." she whispered. "Because we're both broken, aren't we?"

"Rin-chan..."

The girl backed away from him suddenly – the light in her soft eyes faded slightly. "I'm sorry for making you worry, Kakashi-san. But please, don't. You must focus only on your missions," she murmured, her eyes resting on the spot where she knew a fresh tattoo lay. "You have no idea how much I worry already..."

"About me?" he asked softly, wondering if she was going to touch him again. He could tell she wanted to by the look in her eyes. Maybe Rin would break down and suddenly embrace him once more. Secretly, he wished she would – the human contact was rather addicting oddly enough.

Rin smirked. "Perhaps," she replied coyly. "The amount I worry more than compensates for both of us, so just relax. I won't kill myself."

He eyed her unsurely, not sure whether or not to believe her. Her voice wasn't exactly convincing just then and it made him wonder.

"Kakashi-san, really. I promise, alright? If I wasn't around, who'd fix those shoddy healing jobs the ANBU medics perform on you?"

The young Hatake smiled a little underneath his mask, wondering if she could tell – Rin had always been able to read his emotions with uncanny accuracy. The kunoichi had once told him that it was his eyes that always gave him away. They smiled for the rest of his face she'd said, so there was no need to see what lay underneath the mask. That was all "extra stuff". At the time, he'd thought she was just rambling again...or perhaps had suffered a concussion. Now, he firmly believed there wasn't a more beautiful way to put it. Kakashi looked into her soft brown eyes with his steely blue. He said nothing in response to the question she'd put forth, but looking back on it now he wished he'd have told her what he really wanted to say. _"I miss you, Rin-chan. I wish you were our medic – you were always the best at knowing how to fix us...Obito and I..." _

Rin shifted uncomfortably, his gaze almost intimidating her. After all, it was still hard to look at him. The incident was only two years past, and this was something Rin couldn't heal with her ninjutsu. This time, she had to heal the ordinary way. The ANBU noticed that it was slow going – much slower than his healing had been. But he hadn't mended properly at all. Kakashi was a bone left to heal without a cast. But no. He wouldn't bring this up to her. Her soft voice tore him away from these musings just then; the demure notes betrayed no hint of injury. "Kakashi-san?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you. For visiting me. It means a lot."

Kakashi snorted and crossed his arms, head turned away from her defiantly. "I told you – I'm concerned about you missing training. You're already lagging behind and can't afford to miss any more." His voice turned curt and unapproachable despite the warmth he'd felt towards her just now. It was a last defense against these nuisances they called "emotion".

His teammate nodded softly. "Yes, I know. But I'm still grateful."

The boy shrugged off the thank you and turned to go, her soft sigh and the _CLICK_ of her door shutting his only goodbye. He wished he didn't treat her so inhumanely, but at times...he didn't know what else to do. This is how he'd always been, and it's how he'd always be. But still...she was the only one he had regrets about. The only one he cared about. The only one he'd protect with his life. Rin would be the only girl he could ever truly care for. Perhaps it had something to do with all they'd been through already, or maybe because she was the only one who was just as broken as he was. Maybe...maybe...maybe...He didn't really know why, but something inside made him feel oddly protective of the girl. He felt perhaps _over_protective, but as long as she was safe...it didn't matter. It was for her own good, right?

"_It means a lot."_

Kakashi rubbed the back of his neck tiredly as he ambled down the street. _"Perhaps..."_ he thought._ "I'll go visit her again tomorrow. Just to make sure she's going to train. Yes. Train...that's all."_

So he did. Bright and early – just-after-dawn early, actually. Yet, much to his dismay, the young kunoichi had already risen and left the small apartment. Damnit. Where could she have gone? Well, he had his suspicions, but... Kakashi shrugged. Eh, why not? It wouldn't hurt to check, so off he went. Off to the Memorial Stone.

But she wasn't there.

The ANBU began to grow irritated. Could she really be at the hospital _already_? "Damnit, Rin..." he cursed, taking off once more. He was almost there when something stopped him. The boy skidded to a halt on a tiled rooftop, his blue eye zeroing in on a little group not too far away. Could it be...was that...?

Rin stood there – surrounded by a pack of blood-thirsty Uchihas. It was like watching wolves encircling a lamb, the Sharingan in their vengeful eyes – jewels from the very pits of Hell itself.

"Bitch!" one spat in her face, giving her a little shove on the forehead. "Think you can walk around like nothing's wrong? Think we'd forget about what you did to Obito?"

"You should have been the one to die," another chimed in mercilessly. "If you hadn't been such an idiot, he'd still be here. Today's his birthday, ya' know. But guess what? He's not here to celebrate it. Know why?"

She nodded miserably.

"Oh. We're not good enough for words? Answer me, you little _whore_!!" yelled another in her ear. Kakashi saw her flinch, but it wasn't in fear.

"Because he's gone."

"Nope. Wrong answer." The first slapped her hard across the face, making the girl stagger back against a building wall. "Try again."

"Because...I...it's my fault."

"Say it. Say: 'I killed Obito'."

Rin bowed her head, her body trembling violently. Kakashi had had enough. The ANBU leapt down from the roof, earning himself a volley of vicious glares from the "noble clan" members. "I have no qualms about killing whoever touches Rin-chan. Let's see...I think that applies to all of you," he said tonelessly. They exchanged troubled looks amongst themselves, backing away slowly the entire time.

"Fine. But it doesn't change the fact that you two killed him! _Murderers_!" one shouted as they retreated down the street. And then they were gone.

Kakashi muttered curses at them under his breath, wishing death upon them all in the most horrible of fashions. But then something stopped him. The boy turned around to find Rin standing there, forehead pressed against the hard wall, one hand clawing desperately at the stone. The other was clutching her stomach – was she sick? Her face was hidden by her mass of hair, so he couldn't tell what exactly was going through her mind.

"Rin-chan, you shouldn't listen to them. They're ignorant cowards who find ganging up on girls acceptable."

No answer.

"Rin-chan?"

Her shoulders were shaking. Could she be crying?

"Rin..."

She ran. The girl turned away from Kakashi and ran as fast and hard as she could, needing to get away from him. From them. From everything. Rin ran straight to Obito, though she knew Kakashi was right on her heels. But she wouldn't stop. No. She couldn't. He'd lecture her about being weak – about not standing up for herself, and right now a lecture was the last thing she needed. "Let me be, Kakashi!" the kunoichi shouted over her shoulder.

The boy remained silent, focusing only on recapturing his comrade.

Rin knew she couldn't keep this up for long. Her chakra was already dangerously low from healing patients, and every step hurt her more and more. Besides - Kakashi was much faster even wounded than she was at full strength. It was a wonder he hadn't caught her already. Rin turned, her mouth open to yell something at him again, but only gasped as he suddenly crashed into her – arms open wide in some kind of morbid embrace. They tumbled onto the ground, an awkward bundle of tangled arms and legs and various other limbs. Kakashi ended up half-way across her stomach with one arm flung haphazardly across her shoulders. Very advantageous indeed. The boy quickly recovered his position so she was pinned to the ground, though he could tell she lacked the will to fight much more.

"What are you doing?" he hissed loudly into her face.

Rin flinched at his harshness, but seemed to be at a loss for words. "I...don't...know..." she finally stammered out. "I just...I..."

"Running isn't the answer to everything. It only makes you look—"

"Weak? Yes, I know. I know full well I'm weak, alright?! Are you going to make me say it too then, Kakashi?"

Rin's bitterness and anger surprised her teammate. It was rare she lashed out at someone... "Say what?" he asked. Then it dawned on him.

"I did it. _I_ killed Obito! It was me, alright? If I had noticed that genjutsu earlier..." Her voice was breaking now. "If I had been just a little bit stronger..." She was struggling to hold back her tears. "If I hadn't been so weak..." Rin trembled as she choked back sobs. "Obito-kun...he might still be here..."

Kakashi's eye fell. "No," he murmured. "It's not your fault, Rin-chan..." Damn his big mouth. Why the hell couldn't he just keep it shut sometimes? The pained figure beneath him was demanding comfort now. He should give it without hesitation, but something was stopping him. The young man got off Rin, his good eye averted in embarrassment. So what was he supposed to do? Hold her? As if sensing the bewilderment swirling around in his head, Rin forced the tears back and smiled for him – just to make sure he didn't feel like he had to comfort her. Kakashi felt like even more of an asshole because of it. She was trying to placate _him_ when it should be the other way around... But she'd always been that way. Rin had always denied herself for the sake of others – but especially for him and for Obito. But now that Obito was...

"Kakashi-san? I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

He mumbled something under his breath, making a few piss-poor excuses. "Sorry," he finally managed to say.

Rin smiled again. "It's fine. You have nothing to be sorry for, okay?" She stood and brushed off her clothes. "I should be getting to the hospital. I'm terribly late for my next shift already..."

"Rin-chan?"

She paused and eyed him curiously. "Yes?"

"I...think I..."

The girl looked confused. "Is something wrong?"

He shook his head. "No. But, I want you to know that I...I..."

"Yes...?"

"I want you to keep up the good work at the hospital. It really helps them out you know."

Rin's face fell slightly, as if she'd been hoping for something else. "Thank you, Kakashi-san. I will definitely try my best."

He nodded silently – a stony countenance the only thing he could offer her right now. The young Hatake observed as she then slowly headed off towards the hospital. She walked stiffly, mechanically. Maybe he should have tried a little harder... Then he saw it. Yes, it was definitely there. Rin shuddered, wiping fiercely at what he supposed were her eyes. So...she was crying again? He thought she'd grown out of it, but it seemed she had lapses every so often.

Kakashi knew full well what she'd wanted him to say.

She wanted his love.

His comfort.

His heart.

But Kakashi couldn't do it. He couldn't give it to her yet. Rin was something so pure, so gentle, so loving...and he was a monster. An ANBU. A killer...a murderer. He slaughtered men, women, and children too young to leave their mothers. And he did it without hesitation. Rin was right. How could he truly protect her, truly care for her, when all he'd learned was how to kill? Did he remember how to love? Kakashi had barely greeted his fifth year when he happened upon Sakumo's bloody corpse. And his mother...he barely remembered the woman. What was love? Was this feeling he had for Rin...was it love? Kakashi had no idea. But one thing he did know...

He wanted to protect her. Forever. He wanted to be her _only_ keeper. She was his. His to protect. To watch. To care for. Rin belonged to Kakashi and no one would ever take her from him – not as long as he was alive at least.

"_Yes,"_ he supposed. _"This could be...love." _

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Kakashi-san?"

"Mm-hm?"

"Kakashi..."

The man detested the very idea of moving. This warmth...it was so cozy and deliciously soft. Had he died and gone to Heaven? Was he buried in a clouds made of sunlight? That must be what it was...

"Kakashi...I can't breathe."

Was that Rin's voice? Ah, he _must_ be in Heaven.

"Really. I'm not joking...Wake up."

The Jounin frowned beneath his mask, finally moving himself off her stomach – muttering curses the entire time. However, it was still early and he was determined to get more sleep. Rin was too shocked to protest when Kakashi then buried his head in her shoulder, his breathing slow and steady. Yes, she knew for sure now, he was most definitely asleep again. At least he wasn't crushing her diaphragm though...

"Kakashi-san..." she murmured, more amused than annoyed at this point. "You're still so bad at mornings, aren't you?"

He haphazardly wrapped an arm around her shoulders in response, attempting to reclaim some of the warmth he'd lost during the big move.

Rin sighed and closed her eyes. This wasn't exactly the first thing she wanted to wake up to – a senseless Kakashi sprawled across her bed, head buried in her stomach which in turn compromised her ability to breathe properly. And besides...this closeness wasn't exactly the best thing for either of them. It might end awkwardly just as it always had. "Why are you here?" the girl wondered aloud. "Don't you have students waiting for you?"

He sighed into her hair quite suddenly, making Rin question if he was really asleep or not. "Rin-chan..."

The girl flinched. Was he sleep-talking? Since when had he taken up that habit? Kakashi gently tightened his embrace, nuzzling his face deeper into her silken crown. So soft...

"I love you..." he told her thoughtlessly. "Stay with me."

Rin nearly choked on her own spit. "No...No, you don't, Kakashi-san," she reasoned gently, as if with a delusional child. It was taking every fiber of self-control in her body to stay calm. She didn't want to hear this. Not now.

His true eye opened to half-mast, though it was still clouded over with want of sleep. "But I do."

She shook her head desperately. "No. You don't. Don't say things you don't mean, Kakashi. Now, go back to sleep."

His eye closed obediently, yet he murmured, "I'm sorry, Rin-chan...for everything..." And then he was out.

His former teammate squinted, then closed her eyes. If they were shut, the pain couldn't leak out – at least, that's what she hoped. Rin wanted to scream so badly right now. So, _so_ badly! Why now? Why tell her this now? Why would he do such a thing? Did he know how badly it hurt to hear this? Did he know how long she ached to hear those three little words...only to be denied over and over and over again? Did he know how much torment she was going through right now – knowing that she was doomed though she'd finally found what she'd wanted? Did he _know_?

"Bastard..." Rin whispered. "You are _such_ a bastard..."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Was it raining?

Kakashi was sure he felt raindrops...but it was so warm... No, this couldn't be rain. What was it then?

The Jounin slowly opened his eye, suddenly shocked and confused as to why he was holding Rin like this. He jumped away, muttering apologies under his breath until he noticed...she was crying. Not blood this time, but tears. Actual tears. "Rin-chan?" he murmured tentatively. "I'm sorry, really. Did I hurt you?"

She smirked, keeping her eyes shut despite the fact that she was already weeping. Despite the fact that pieces of her soul had already started to fall away. "Just a little..." she whispered.

Kakashi glanced over at the clock. Only _one hour_ left? "How long have you been awake?" he demanded hoarsely, finding that he couldn't get the words out fast enough.

"Almost twenty minutes or so. I'm not really sure. Does it matter?"

"Rin-chan, there's something I have to tell you..." he began now, working up enough courage to finally spit out those three words he'd never been able to say. Why was it that he could go out and face an Akatsuki without flinching, yet now he was practically _frightened_ to admit his love to Rin?

Rin stopped him. "No. I don't want to hear it again," she said brokenly. "Please don't."

"But, how do you know—"

"You told me already. Just now. In your sleep." The girl took a deep breath and let her eyes flutter open, the tears dusting her eyelashes like crystalline powder. "How could you say that to me...how could you say that to me now?"

"But...Rin..."

"Couldn't you have told me _then_? When I hadn't done...all _this_?! When I wasn't on the brink of death? Why now, Kakashi? Why?!" she sobbed, keeping her eyes on the ceiling. "Why couldn't you have told me then?!"

The man's head hung low, his eye focused intently on the floor at his feet. She was right. Why? Why hadn't he done it sooner? "I wanted you to know..." came the troubled reply. "Before it was too late."

Rin wiped at her face harshly, demanding that her tears stop flowing. "And you don't think it's already too late?"

The Hatake shook his head a little. "You'll probably forget about everything, forget about me, about us...so why not? I want you to know that I'm not completely heartless before you..." He couldn't say the last word.

The girl slowly looked over at him – her brown eyes struggling to focus through the tears. "Are you patronizing me, Kakashi? Are you telling me what I want to hear because you _pity_ me?"

He shook his head again, struggling to maintain a cool persona. It was proving to be most difficult.

Rin only stared at him. Was she trying to determine if he was telling the truth? "Look at me, Kakashi," she quietly demanded. "Let me see your eye."

The man obeyed and lifted his true eye to meet both of hers. The sorrow between the two was almost excruciating, but no more tears fell. That's right – she'd said something about his eyes once. Rin studied him intently, analyzing every detail in his face. Could she believe him? Could she accept his love?

"Your eye always gives you away, you know?"

Ah yes, that's what she'd said – wait. Kakashi snapped his attention back to the present. Oh, she'd said that just now. "Does it?" he asked her softly.

Rin smiled that broken smile of hers – how it tore him apart to see it! "Yes..." she told him. "I think I'll have to explain it to you sometime."

The man's heart skipped a beat, but overcompensated for it by pounding twice as fast now. Did he just hear her right? "It seems complicated – it might take you a while."

The girl nodded. "I know. I guess I'll have to stay here until you understand then...if that's alright."

Kakashi reached out his hand, which she accepted gently with her own. "It's more than fine..." he whispered. "I'll take care of you until then, alright?"

"Fine..." she sighed, the troubled look fading away slightly. "Just promise me one thing."

"Anything."

Rin looked at him, her eyes dark and serious. "After I'm done teaching you, you mustn't cry. Alright?"

He stared hard at the girl, not sure whether or not he could keep that promise. "I...don't..."

"Promise me."

He ran a hair through his silver mane. Damn. This was going to be a hard one, wasn't it? "I promise," he murmured.

Rin smiled and laid her head back down on the pillow, while Kakashi stole a glance at the clock. Forty-three minutes left.

And Obito was coming.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

**Thanks so much, guys!**

**Mojo817****: Haha, thanks! I appreciate the kindness!**

**Eldr-Fire****: Aww, 'sanku! Your comments are always lovely to read. You're too nice. xD**

**Sakra-chan****: Whahahaha! Yes! Thanks for the technological coaching! And I totally loved having you beta this chapter for me. Thank you (x a million)!! And I'm totally sure you can write like me – your writing is really great! Heck, I'm sure it's way better than mine, so don't say stuff like that! TT.TT**

**Ljusets Korsriddare****: Ohoho...you'll just have to wait and find out... xD**

**Anyways, this chapter was more fluff than it was angst, but no worries. I've got the ending all figured out now. It'll be good...I hope. So, thanks again for reading/reviewing and I hope the confession wasn't too cheesy. I'm not particularly gifted when it comes to writing those sorts of things. Eh...whatever. xP **

**- Hikari**

**PS – the entire "middle part" was a series of flashbacks, but I didn't want to put most of the chapter in italics. I find it annoying quite honestly when there's a ton of text in italics or bold-face. Like now. Ahahaha...oh well... **


	7. The Willful Slaughter of Hope

**Chapter 7****: The Willful Slaughter of Hope**

He had to save her. Kakashi wouldn't let anyone come and take away his precious Rin-chan – not even Obito. _Especially_ not Obito. Not now. Not ever.

He'd left her back at the hospital, promising to return within the hour. It was time to recruit some back-up. With the ANBU on his side, Kakashi couldn't lose to the Akatsuki. It would be impossible, right? The Jounin stood impatiently before the Hokage, whom he'd just informed of the entire situation. She looked shocked, staring blankly at the man before her. "And...you want to prevent him from re-obtaining Rin?" she asked unsurely after a moment.

Kakashi nodded. "Precisely. I would be most grateful if the ANBU were allowed to assist me. Obito is an Akatsuki after all, so securing him would be an advantageous move for both of us."

"And you say he'll be here at any minute?"

"Yes," he replied curtly through gritted teeth. He already said that two minutes ago! How many times was he going to have to repeat himself? The man thought that Tsunade should be able to understand that time was running out. Hell, – he checked the clock – they only had twenty-some-odd minutes now! _"C'mon..."_ he muttered silently. _"I really don't have time for this."_

Tsunade hummed and hawed and shuffled through a few papers as she considered all possible options. "I don't see why not," she finally announced. "It would be ill-fated should Obito bring others with him however. And he was alone the last time you say?"

"Yes."

"Well..." The blonde rubbed her temples. "Go ahead then. There are twelve members on border patrol already, so you think five is enough for now?"

He shrugged nonchalantly. "Preferably, I'd have liked more. However, beggars can't be choosers, can they? Thank you, Hokage-sama. I truly appreciate the favor."

She nodded. "Just go already. I thought he was coming at any moment." She noticed he looked slightly anxious, which was quite unusual for the Hatake. "And don't worry about Rin. I'm heading over to her room right now actually."

"Thanks," he mumbled before taking off. Time to gather Obito's welcoming party.

Tsunade gathered her files with a heavy sigh. That man was incredibly determined to hold onto Rin no matter what. She wondered what he would do when the time came...

"Shizune!" she barked.

"Y-Yes, Tsunade-sama!?"

"I'm going to see Rin. Continue to file all these miscellaneous reports – I'm expecting it done by the time I return, got it?"

The poor woman nodded miserably. "Of course. I'll get to it right away," she complied as her mentor exited.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Rin's placid stare hardened into a glower as Tsunade opened the door and walked towards her bedside. The last thing she wanted right now was more tests, more questions, more demands. Why couldn't they just let her die in peace? She'd agreed to stay here and keep her memories for the short time she had left. Couldn't they just let things be? The answer was a resounding "No". Of course not. What could she have been thinking?

"Rin, I have a few more tests I need to run through while Kakashi is away, so if you'll kindly comply—"

"Well, I don't have much choice now do I, Hokage-sama?" Her soft voice was saturated with a lethal dose of sarcasm. Interesting.

Tsunade frowned and scribbled something on her notepad. "No. But it would be nice if there wasn't too much resistance, alright?"

Rin rolled her eyes. "Fine, fine. What do you need from me then?"

"Tell me about your 'reincarnation' technique. I need to know something. There was clearly a body in your coffin, but it obviously wasn't you. Did you actually kill someone to feign your own death?"

The girl narrowed her eyes in response. "Well, you didn't notice anyone missing from the village did you?"

"Don't toy with me, Rin."

"_I_ killed no one. If you'd checked the morgue, you might have found that a body was misplaced. Perhaps—"

"And how did you switch places?"

"Simple," she shrugged. "I combined a summoning jutsu with a body replacement, followed closely by a _Shikon no Jutsu_. It's rather obvious that there wasn't any other way to do it, Hokage-sama. Do you really need to continue questioning me?"

Tsunade glared daggers at the younger girl. "Yes," she hissed. "Now, I thought that the Yakushi clan was the only one who knew how to perform that technique properly...or would even go so far as to reanimate a corpse for their own twisted purposes."

Rin's brown eyes flashed dangerously, a smirk playing upon her pretty lips. "Well, you've underestimated me yet again Hokage-sama. In desperation, one is willing to do most anything..."

"It's completely sick." The Godaime continued scribbling on her little pad. "Defiling the dead in such a way..."

The girl shrugged a little. "Just be thankful I didn't _actually_ kill anyone, Hokage-sama. At least I used a corpse, alright?"

"Why are you talking like this?!" demanded Tsunade quite suddenly. "Are you really _that_ cold-hearted?"

"Why, yes..." Rin fingered a loose thread on her blanket, her eyes softening as they ceased to focus on anything. Her superiority began to transform into a distant sorrow – one filled with tortured regret. But what exactly was the girl regretting? "I think I might be..."

"And why is that?"

"Because," she said miserably. "I think my heart must have died a long time ago."

The older woman was taken aback, her own brown eyes widening in shock as she begun to realize what was really going on here. "Who _are_ you?" came the horrified whisper.

Rin could only smile in response.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Spread out!"

The group nodded and (quite literally) disappeared from Kakashi's presence. Ah...it brought back memories of the good old days – though the Jounin wouldn't quite describe them as "good". More like...horrible, tragic, dark...

He sighed heavily, his good eye focused intently on the kunai in his hand. Since when had it come to this? He was preparing to fight off his former comrade – his former brother. Did the gods find this amusing? He cursed their twisted sense of humor if that was the case.

"Obito...don't do it," he murmured into the chilling breeze. "Please. For both our sakes. Don't come."

It was already fifteen minutes past time. Obito had always been late hadn't he? Typical. So he was still the same as ever... Kakashi shivered slightly. That fact alone made it so much harder to do this. But it had to be done. He wouldn't let Obito capture his most precious possession with such ease. Never. The Jounin's sharp ears suddenly picked up on a most disturbing sound...

The hospital alarm.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Rin stood before the Memorial Stone, her gaze locked on the engraved letters with an almost fierce look in her eye. So they hadn't inscribed Sakumo's name on here? Even after they realized how wrong they had been? Ridiculous. Rin was interrupted when she felt a strong chakra presence tug at her own. Oho...So he'd come had he?

The girl stiffened noticeably, turning to address her former teammate with a carefully prepared speech. She could tell he was smiling, even beneath that mask of his.

"Rin-chan..."

"Obito-kun."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

Kakashi forgot all about keeping his post. Rin might be in danger - nothing could be more important than ensuring her safety. Had Obito attacked the hospital directly? The nerve! Kakashi began counting the ways he'd kill this intruder, each method more brutal than the last. Oh, he'd enjoy removing Obito's heart – he'd show him how far the Raikiri had come since their days of childhood. The Jounin would enjoy the gurgling sound spewing forth from the Akatsuki's froth-corrupted lungs, the violent tremors sweeping through his destroyed body. Oh yes, Kakashi would enjoy it very much.

He flew towards the eyesore of a building; the bursts of chakra applied to each step propelled him forward with god-like speed. Upon nearing it, the silver-haired man grew more and more confused. There was no smoke. There was no damage. There was no Akatsuki anywhere in sight. There were only nurses scurrying about like headless chickens – squawking and screaming about some kind of "horror", "atrocity", "escape"...

The last one caught his attention.

Kakashi burst through the doors and made it to Rin's room in (what he supposed) was record time. Then, he halted. What the _hell_ was going on here?

"Kakashi-san?"

He stared blankly at the girl, his own confusion nearly matching hers. "Rin-chan, is something wrong?" he breathed, masking his unease with great care. "I thought that maybe..."

Rin smiled calmly. "You thought I'd left? Kakashi-san, do you really distrust me that much?"

The man shook his head and drew near to her side. "Of course I trust you. I only thought that, maybe, someone else had taken you away."

"Like Obito-kun?"

He nodded.

"Obito-kun will understand. He would let me stay should I request it..." The girl rubbed her eyes tiredly and sat up. "Perhaps you shouldn't be so hard on him, Kakashi-san. He's only looking out for my good you know."

Kakashi pocketed his hands, his lone eye studying Rin with quiet intensity. How could he not be "hard on him"? Obito had merely stood by whilst Rin slowly committed suicide. How could he forgive him for that? He couldn't. He could never forgive this; he could never forgive someone for hurting Rin. Even if it was indirectly, Kakashi believed that Obito had had a hand in her current condition. Unacceptable.

"_HATAKE_!!"

The screech was enough to give him a little jump. Damn that blonde broad. "Yes, Hokage-sama?" he replied carelessly, not in the mood for a lecture about shirking duties and whatnot.

"Get away from her right now!!" Tsunade hissed, her whole body tensed.

The Jounin only stared at her. What? Had he just heard that right? "Um, Hokage-sama...what do you—?"

The Godaime narrowed her eyes into mere slits. "Get. Away. From. Her."

"But—"

"_NOW_!!" she roared.

Alright then. So Tsunade had finally lost it, eh? He'd wondered when she'd officially go senile on them. "Alright, alright..." he muttered taking two steps back. "I don't understand why you—"

"Hokage-sama, really now." The sweet voice made him turn back to Rin. Kakashi was rather surprised to see such a..._malicious_ expression on her gentle face. It was cynical...scornful... What was going on here? This wasn't Rin at all. "I think you're overreacting a bit."

The Hokage pointed an accusing finger at the patient. "You shut-up." She turned to Kakashi. "Don't get near it. This..._thing_ isn't Rin."

The Jounin wanted to laugh aloud at this statement. This wasn't Rin? So who was it then? _Obito_? The chakra frequency was definitely Rin's, so... "Sorry, what?"

"You heard me. It's not Rin."

"Don't listen to her, Kakashi-san. This bitch's purely delusional. I think she's lost her mind, quite frankly."

That did it. Kakashi knew for a fact that Rin would never slander the Hokage so shamelessly – and to her face!? Definitely not. "Rin-chan...?" he said, his good eye questioning her painfully. Would Rin really...would she _really_...?

Tsunade approached Rin, her strides carrying her swiftly to the girl. The woman reached out and grabbed Rin by the throat (protested loudly by Kakashi), pulling the girl's face close to her own. "Who are you? And where's Rin? I've just checked everyone in the hospital, and she's not here. Tell me!"

The girl smirked – her brown eyes narrowed in a vicious leer. "What if I don't tell you, hm?" she whispered hoarsely. "What's the worst you can do to a _carcass_?"

Kakashi openly gaped at Rin, disbelieving that he could really be hearing this right now. "W-What...Rin, no..."

The Hokage frowned deeply and shoved the girl to the bed. "I'll find a way to get it out of you then. Kakashi!" she barked.

The man had staggered over to the wall, groping for something to support his weight which was threatening to come crashing down at any moment now. This couldn't be happening...this couldn't be happening. Why? What had she done now? And who was this lying in bed? Rin couldn't have preformed another jutsu – her fingers had been _taped_ for crying out loud!

"Kakashi!" repeated the Hokage.

"Y-Yes..."

"Go out and resume your position in the field. I'm sure that if you find Obito, you'll find Rin. Now, hurry!"

"Yes, hurry-hurry!" sang the thing on Rin's bed. "Better find her quick, _'Kashi-kun_!"

He suddenly wanted to vomit. What sick joke had Rin decided to play on them this time? Oh, he was definitely going to get some answers. "I'll bring her back. And when I do, I'll make sure she stays." His voice was dark. It slightly worried Tsunade, but she remained silent as the man disappeared. There was no reckoning with him now, and frankly – she didn't want to. Rin had broken his heart yet again, outright betrayed his trust, and that was perhaps the most horrible sin of all.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Obito-kun, why are you here?" she murmured, tracing her fingers along the Stone's coarse surface.

The Akatsuki shrugged. "Isn't it time to go home now, Rin-chan? You saw Hatake-san, so...aren't you done?"

The girl also shrugged, keeping her soft eyes plastered to the various names. "I don't know..." she told him tiredly. "I think I've done something quite horrible this time, Obito-kun...Something I can't ever be forgiven for."

"Oh?" The masked figure drew nearer, latching onto her shoulder with a gloved hand. "And what would that be? You break something?" he sniggered.

Rin smiled and shook her head. "Yes. I'm afraid I might have broken something," the girl sighed heavily._ "I think I might have broken his heart..."_ Did that make her a monster? Why, yes. Yes it did. At least, that's what Rin thought. Vengeance wasn't so sweet at all, was it? Not that this is what she'd been planning the whole time, but still... The girl tugged at the cloth over her heart. It was aching so damn much right now, and she wished it would stop.

"Did he apologize?"

Her sepia irises rose to the fiery mask. "Apologize for what?"

"The Sharingan. He told me he used it on you."

Ah yes, he had used it hadn't he? She'd almost forgotten. "Yes, he did."

"And you're ready to leave now, right?"

The question was heavy. Rin didn't know if she could go away, knowing that she'd left Kakashi with a broken heart. A heart that might not ever heal properly without her care. A heart that she'd mended for a short while, then shattered in one cruel moment. A heart that had been hers and hers alone. Now it was injured...she still had time to fix it. But would she?

"Obito-kun..."

He pulled her into his chest and embraced her warmly. "Rin-chan, I'll stay with you until the end. You don't have to worry anymore. Hatake-san won't ever hurt you again."

The girl smiled a little. "You were always such a good friend, Obito-kun. Thank you for looking after me for so long."

The man laughed and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Heh, Rin-chan! Stop it! You're making it sound like this _is_ the end. We still have until we reach the River Country you know. It's at least two days away, so wait until then, alright?"

How was she going to say this? How _could_ she say this to him? To _Obito-kun_...the man who'd loved her for so long...who'd taken such meticulous care of her... It was so ungrateful.

"I...have to stay..."

He froze. Rin could feel his entire body stiffen up. "C'mon, Rin-chan. That's not a funny joke at all," he laughed, though it was obviously forced.

The girl pulled away from him, her eyes focused intently on his one. "Please, _please_, Obito-kun. Don't make it harder than it already is."

"But why?!" he croaked. "Why on earth would you choose to stay _here_? With _him_?!"

Rin stared hard at the ground, feeling shamefaced and guiltier than ever. "Because..." she started slowly. "I still care about him."

The Akatsuki snorted loudly. He was obviously angry and not afraid to show it. Rin wondered what he'd do or say, but maybe...if she stalled long enough... "You love him." Obito crossed his arms, shaking his head in disbelief. "After everything he's done to you, you love him. Are you _mad_?!"

"Perhaps," she replied. "But even if I was completely sane, I think I'd still feel the same way."

"No!" Obito's voice suddenly grew dark, dangerous, low. "You can never love _him_."

Rin took a step back, rather shocked at this change in tone. "Obito?" Her eyes grew wide as they watched him pull out a kunai. "Obito? Wait, what...what are you doing?!" He started to advance on her. "Stop it! This isn't like you at all!" He still came closer. "So you're going to _kill_ me? Is that it? Are you that—!?"

Rin was cut off by this blinding pain in her chest, this pain that was quickly spreading out from her heart to the very tips of her fingers and toes. What happened? When had he stabbed her? Obito was so fast...Rin's vision was now spotting, her breath slowing down. She hadn't even seen him move. Then as he replied, Rin was sure she could hear his heart breaking in two. Why? Why was she capable only of hurting people? Wasn't she a medic? A healer? A comforter? But no. All Rin could do to her beloveds was hurt them. Perhaps she deserved this fate after all, because she was, in fact, a monster.

"You don't have to love _me_..." Obito whispered beside her. "But you can _never_ love _him_."

"Obito...kun..."

She felt her body collapsing onto the cold ground, but could do nothing to prevent it. Rin watched Obito stand before her, surveying his morbid handiwork, then turn and leave her lying there. Bleeding. Hurting. Dying there. And she could do nothing to heal herself. All chakra reserves had been used in one final jutsu - one final act in this dark play. Now, she would die without ever telling Kakashi she was sorry, telling her love that she hadn't wanted to hurt him. Everything was so bright all of a sudden, and then...there was only darkness...

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

The Jounin prayed that it wasn't too late. He prayed that Rin hadn't left already. He prayed, and prayed, and prayed. _"Please...don't let her leave me yet..."_ He'd been so close (_so_ close!) to finally having her. Finally having the opportunity to become human again. To feel human emotion. To love.

He flew past the Memorial's clearing, only glancing into it for a split second...but it was enough. Perhaps it was too much. Kakashi skidded to a halt, half-sure he was hallucinating. Something lay crumpled into a loose ball of flesh, and hair, and blood. God – there was so much blood! It was starting to pool around her body. This was too close to her first death. Kakashi couldn't bear seeing this horror once again. "No..." he whispered as he staggered towards the stone. "_NO_!!"

Her body...it wasn't moving, was it? The man sank to his knees, afraid to touch this cold girl before him. A large kunai protruded cruelly out of a crude hole someone had carved into her chest. No...no, this was wrong. This wasn't Rin. This couldn't be Rin. Why would anyone...? _"No. NO!!"_ his mind screamed over and over into the biting silence. "Rin...chan..." He tried to steady his hands, but everything was shaking so badly right now. All he could do was sit and stare, one hand extended towards her in want of comfort. All he wanted right now was for her to get up. All he wanted was to see her chest rise and fall with the replenishing of precious oxygen. All he wanted was to know she was still here. With him. Suddenly, he sensed something behind him, whirled, and blocked a kunai with only the flesh on his arm. "Obito..." he greeted darkly, his voice laced with hostile venom. "So, you're the bastard responsible..."

"Hatake-san, such colorful language!"

The Jounin narrowed his single eye in hatred. "And there's much more to come," he muttered, using his free hand to push the hitai-ate up onto his forehead. Now, he was ready to fight. He was ready to kill this son of a bitch. He was going to send Obito straight to the deepest pits of Hell. "I thought you loved Rin!"

"I do love her!" snapped the other, his voice losing all civility. "She means more to me than the likes of _you_ could ever begin to fathom."

Kakashi gritted his teeth and shoved Obito back, first digging the kunai deeper into his flesh of his arm before suddenly ripping it free. It really did hurt like Hell. "Then why kill her? Why do this?" he demanded hoarsely.

Obito pointed the bloody kunai straight at Kakashi, threatening to slice him open once again. "It's all _your_ fault," he said.

"My fault?!" The Jounin was incredulous.

The Akatsuki's voice hardened to an inhuman degree of coldness. "I've loved Rin since our childhood. She was my best friend, and I was hers! And when she was alone, I found her and cared for her. I've never stopped loving her – not for a single moment. But now...she has betrayed me because of _you_. Therefore, you must die."

Kakashi stared icily at his former comrade. "What happened to you? When did you lose your sanity, Uchiha?" The man pulled out his own kunai now. "So be it. You killed Rin-chan..._our_ Rin-chan. Now you must die too."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

**Okay, so first the thank-you's! **

**Sakra-chan****: Again, I really loved you beta-ing for me. I find it so very helpful! And thanks again for your kindness. Do you really have nothing bad to say?! ;P**

**Eldr-Fire****: I love reading your comments! They're always so encouraging, so thank you! And I just hope Sakra-chan feels the same way... xD**

**Alrighteh. So some disclaimers I've gotta throw out there for the public...**

**1) The chapter title, "Willful Slaughter of Hope", is actually a quote from Steven Deitz: "...betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope."**

**2) Is the ending scenario familiar? If you watched "House of Flying Daggers", it might be. Will it end the same way though? Guess you'll have to wait and see! ;P Oh, and I highly recommend that movie. It's Chinese, so you'll have some subtitlin' to look forward to. Anyways, it's a wonderful plotline and has awesome visual effects/martial arts choreography. It's one of my all-time favorite movies...EVER. **

**H'okay! So I think that should do it. Until next chapter...**

**- Hikari **


	8. To Where Tears Fall

**Chapter 8****: To Where Tears Fall**

Shaking.

Sweating.

Panting.

It was becoming too much. Kakashi wasn't sure just how long he could keep this up…and that was a bad sign. He and Obito had clashed kunai only thrice now, and frankly – it was more than enough. The Akatsuki's strength matched his own, and the remaining Sharingan was proving to be a most formidable opponent in and of itself.

"Give it up, Hatake! You and I – we'll be at this all day you know."

The Jounin thought of making a few hand signs as a precautionary measure. He couldn't know when the other would choose to attack. It was true – this could go on indefinitely...or until one of them broke. However, Obito was only half-right…he hadn't taken the ANBU into account. They'd be sure to show up any second now. Hell, the clashing of kunai was creating more than enough noise to bring them running.

"I'll stop once you're dead."

The other laughed from all around, his amusement echoing off the empty space with uncanny resonance. There! Kakashi launched his kunai into the brush, sidestepping to avoid a barrage of incoming needles thrown at the same time. Obito in turn flew out from his hiding and circled behind the Jounin. Kakashi whirled, Sharingan flashing, and began making hand seals in conjunction with Obito. "_Goukakyuu no Jutsu_!!" they shouted in unison - hands reaching to mouth. The combined fireball the two created could have rivaled one of the Kyuubi's.

When Kakashi reemerged from his underground hiding place (a nice Headhunter Jutsu had protected him from the fallout created), he quickly surveyed the damage done in one quick glance, then turned to look for Obito. Gone. He looked for Rin. Also gone. "No..." he whispered hoarsely. Had she been taken? Or perhaps he'd unintentionally cremated his beloved? The horror!

"Hatake-san!" sang a grating voice.

Kakashi whirled about to find the Akatsuki standing there, feet straddling their former teammate and friend. How dare he defile her body like this?! The Jounin literally growled from deep within his chest, his mismatched irises burning in cold rage.

"I found Rin-chan. She looks hurt." Obito nudged the kunai in her heart with his toe. That's when Kakashi realized his horrible, horrible mistake. He realized it when Rin shuddered. When she gasped in pain. When she coughed wetly, blood spurting from between her pale lips. She hadn't died. Not yet. But almost... But this was all wrong. He'd felt for her pulse, for her breath, for any signs of life. Rin had definitely been dead. Unless...was this also one of Rin's many "puppets"? The color drained from his face as he looked upon the girl. He couldn't take that chance of it "not being Rin". Kakashi had to save her now. She was almost gone, but he could help her yet! This was nothing Tsunade couldn't heal. Rin would be alright. He'd forgive her for trying to leave. He'd forgive her and they'd go home together, perhaps marry, and live out the rest of their lives in peace. Yes. Yes, that was what they'd do...but Obito was the one standing in the way of these happy dreams.

"My, my. How embarrassing. I was pretty shocked when I saw you left her for dead. Her heartbeats might be faint, her breathing might be shallow – but that's no excuse. And you call yourself a shinobi...tsk, tsk." Obito shook his head in mock disappointment, though he himself had thought Rin dead as well.

"Shut up," hissed the other. "Don't you dare touch Rin-chan!"

The first laughed and placed his foot on the kunai's handle. Then he pushed. Rin moaned faintly, protesting as loudly as she could to his assault. It hurt Kakashi to hear her suffering – this was torture and Obito knew it. "Stop!" the Jounin cried. "What is it you want?!"

Obito removed his foot. "First, tell them to back off," he said, nodding to something behind Kakashi. The silver-haired man turned to find the ANBU squadron armed and prepared to fight, awaiting Kakashi's command.

"Sir!" cried the leader. "What are your orders, _sir_!?"

Kakashi motioned for them to stand down. "Inform Tsunade that she should be ready come at any moment. As soon as I finish off this filth before us, she'll be needed immediately."

They nodded and flickered out of sight. "There. Happy?" inquired the Jounin dryly.

Obito shrugged. "It's a start. Now – let's play a little game, shall we?"

Kakashi shot him a most venomous glare. "What kind of game, Uchiha?"

"Oh, it'll be fun. I promise. So..." The Akatsuki leapt several hundred feet back so that he and Kakashi were on opposite sides of the clearing, and Rin lay in the dead center. "Do you remember...your 'special' jutsu? The one you were so, _so_ proud of, Hatake-san?"

The Jounin eyed him warily. What exactly was Obito up to with this? Where was this going?

"Chidori...revised to Raikiri. Impressive, I must say. And after the little 'accident' we had in Rock country, I believe you were able to perfect the technique, ne?"

His question was met with silence, but Obito didn't seem to mind too much.

"So, let's try it - you and I. I want to learn this jutsu of yours...and I want to destroy you with it."

"And if I refuse?"

Obito chuckled darkly. "Let's just say...Rin-chan will meet a hellish demise. Exploding tags are so useful, aren't they?"

"You _bastard_!!" the Jounin roared furiously, his fists clenched so tightly the knuckles had turned white.

"Yes, yes. But it's all deserved – her death I mean. Anyways, I wanted her to stay somewhat alive so she could watch me kill you. Won't that be fun? Now – _show_ me the jutsu! I'm watching!" Obito sang, tapping the eyehole on his mask.

Kakashi gritted his teeth in frustration. So...he'd kill one teammate no matter what. Well, the choice wasn't hard. He'd kill Obito before he killed Rin. "Fine!" he muttered, preparing himself. "I didn't know you wanted to die so badly!" Then he froze. Rin, despite her traumatic wounds, was struggling to her feet. She'd surely protest this face-off, and that would be certain death by means of exploding tag. He had to do it _now_! Hands began to fly, Obito copying them in perfect synchronization as expected. But Rin...she was on her knees now... There! He'd finished the hand seals – but no! She was on her feet...

"_NO_, RIN!!" he screamed, forgetting the jutsu. "Get down!"

Her glassy eyes widened first in bewilderment, then in fear as she heard the crackling of the Raikiri behind her. Rin knew full well what was happening now – he was going to die. "Kakashi..." she murmured tearfully. There was no chance in Hell at this point. Kakashi had no time to escape the lightning quick attack with another jutsu. Obito charged, Raikiri extended clumsily before him – eye set on Kakashi's heart. His target. How quickly Death was approaching.

Three.

Rin mustered everything in her body...and turned.

Two.

Kakashi screamed and began racing towards her.

One.

But Obito beat him to it.

Rin whirled and received the blow meant for Kakashi...who stood just behind her now. He'd been a half-second too late. Obito's gory hand quivered slightly as it protruded from her back. "W-What...have you...done...?" he gasped. "There was no exploding tag...you would have _lived_!! You fool! Why didn't you just stay down!?"

The girl's soggy cough was enough of a response. Blood sprayed everywhere, painting Obito's orange mask red. The Akatsuki ripped his arm out and staggered backwards, Rin's body sinking downward as it followed the river of blood pouring forth from it. Kakashi reached out and caught her in his embrace to prevent her from hitting the ground. The girl attempted to smile her thanks, but choked on more gore forcing itself up her throat. There would be no more smiles from Rin. "Ka...Ka..."

He pressed his hand to her mouth to quiet her. "No, it's alright. Save your breath, Rin...I'm taking you to Tsunade. Hang on..."

"No...don't..." she protested, her words hardly audible. "No hope...left..."

Kakashi felt wetness at the corners of both eyes. "Don't say that," he pleaded, caressing her silken tresses with a bloodied hand. "No, of course there's hope left, Rin-chan! Of course there's hope left."

Rin coughed again, though much more weakly this time. "Remember. You...can't cry...you promised..."

"I'm not crying, Rin-chan. See? No tears are running."

"But...you're still..." She couldn't finish the sentence. Kakashi had to choke back his sobs as he gathered her into his chest, rocking her back and forth to soothe her somewhat. "'Kashi-kun..."

He closed his eyes, every syllable tearing him apart. "Yes, Rin?"

"For...give...me?"

"Please don't. You've done nothing, Rin-chan. Everything...it always comes back to me. If I'd treated you properly all those years ago..."

Rin shuddered feebly, refusing Death's temptations just a moment longer. "F-For...give...me?!" she insisted frantically. "Please...'Kashi!"

"Yes, yes! Fine - I forgive you!" he sobbed, finally breaking down into her shoulder. This was too much to handle. Too much to hold inside. "I forgive you – for everything. I forgive you!"

He heard her sigh softly. Was it in contentment? Happiness? Regret? "Bury...me. In...the snow..."

Kakashi nodded silently, clutching her tighter to him. He didn't want to think about burying her. Not again. A near forgotten Obito put a hand to his forehead as he began staggering off. Who knew where he was off to? All Kakashi knew was that the man was wise to disappear. Otherwise, he'd find him. Then he'd send him to another dimension. Piece by. Bloody. Fucking. Piece.

And he'd smile as he did it.

"'Kashi?" Rin whispered weakly. His attention snapped back to her.

This was it. He could tell by her voice...it was so distant. She was more than halfway gone by now, able to hang on to this world by sheer willpower alone. "Rin-chan! No, please don't leave me! Please, _please_ don't leave me! I'm _begging_ you!!" he cried desperately. "_I'm begging you_!"

The girl choked a little, her hand slowly reaching up with the last shreds of strength she had left. Kakashi grasped onto it tightly. "I...want you...to know..."

Her voice...he could barely hear it. "Rin...no."

"I...love...you..." she breathed into his ear. It was the last breath this body in his arms would ever take.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Kakashi. I'm sorry. There's nothing to be done," Tsunade said quietly. "She's gone."

The Jounin shook his head. "No. She's not dead. I thought she was dead before but-"

The Hokage's voice suddenly grew stern. "Stop it, Kakashi! I'm a medical _expert_. Would I lie to you?! She's _dead_!"

"But—"

"No!" she snapped. "Denial isn't going to help anything! Now...I know this is hard, but you'll need to be debriefed in an hour or so. I'll be waiting in my office. Until then, you can say...goodbye." The Godaime's eyes softened a bit as she spoke. "I know there's never enough to time to do so, but try alright?"

Kakashi only stared at the bed in response. The body had been covered with a sheet so that no one would have to look at the mangled corpse he'd brought back. What a sight that had been...what a nightmare.

He crossed the room to be at Rin's side, studying the designs her blood made as it seeped into this sheet over her body. He'd take one last look...just to see her beautiful face. The man reached out and gently pulled the white cloth back only to find...

A different face.

A different body.

A different girl.

Another of Rin's puppets.

So...she'd done it again, but he'd known it all along, hadn't he? And yet...despite this last trick...Kakashi smiled. He smiled because it meant that the real Rin wasn't dead. This wasn't her who lay before him. It wasn't her who Obito had murdered. It wasn't her. He smiled, which slowly turned into chuckling, and finally into incredulous laughter. "Alright, Rin. Alright...I'll go meet you in the snow."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

As he gathered his supplies, Kakashi watched the rain fall – watched the sky bleed out its tears, moaning and sobbing out its sorrow like a wretched mother robbed of her infant. He'd always hated rain.

The Jounin dully shifted his gaze to the distant mountains off Fire's northernmost border. He knew it'd be snowing up there, and she'd always loved it. Rin had loved the snow. He didn't understand why. To the silver-haired man, the stuff was worse than rain. At least rain wasn't so bitterly cold...but she'd loved it all the same.

"_Do you know..." she began slowly. "Do you know what snow really is, Kakashi-san?" _

_Yes, she'd begun to address him formally just following Obito's passage to the next life. He wasn't sure why, but it irked him - more so than being called "'Kashi-kun". "No, Rin...what is snow?" he'd asked her tiredly, not even trying to mask his fatigue. The latest ANBU endeavor had had the young boy chasing what seemed like shadows now...shadows he'd hunted for diligently until they'd all been banished from this world. He couldn't scrub the blood off his hands. The stains had run too deep to merely be washed away with soap and water._

_The girl smiled at the distant mountains, her own eyes in some faraway land – distant, tired, sad. The ANBU wondered if something might be wrong, but his ever-stoic persona kept him from voicing this. "They're crying," she told him, her voice hardly more than a whisper. _

"_Who's crying?" He rubbed his eye wearily, growing thoroughly annoyed with her juvenile suspicions. _

"_The souls," she replied – still gazing off into nowhere. "The snow is their tears." _

_Was she delusional? Drunk? No – he smelled no alcohol on her, and Rin had never been one to drink. "That doesn't make any sense, Rin-chan. Wouldn't it be the rain?" _

_Rin shook her head slowly. "No," she said. "Rain isn't pure – it's only the recycled tears of people who live here – in this world. The gods catch our tears when we cry, and pour them out somewhere else. That's what rain is..."_

"_Rin-chan, this is ridiculous Why are you telling me these old-wives' tales?" he'd snapped suddenly. "Only fools believe in these things." _

_She laughed a little and scratched at one of the indigo stains upon her face. "Then I guess I'm a fool..." Rin then tipped her head down, burying it in her arms, hiding it in her knees. "When I die...I'll remember to cry for you, Kakashi-kun. Even if you hate the snow..." _

"_Cry for me?" he'd asked indignantly. "Why the hell would you do that?" _

_Rin smiled her sad, tired smile again for him – trying to offer the last shreds of comfort her dying soul could muster. "Because someone has to..."_

Kakashi glanced back over his shoulder at the picture sitting on his nightstand. He smirked slightly at Rin's almost-mischievous grin. She'd been so...full of life back then. Maybe, maybe now...they could both start over. They could go back together and try to forget all this bitterness. And together, perhaps they could find happiness.

The Jounin shouldered his pack with a heavy grunt, then headed out the door. Time to go meet Rin.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

**YATA! It's been so long!! I can't believe I actually finished a chapter! I so sorry to all you who were looking forward to a quick update, but moving sucks pretty bad. My compy was disconnected for almost three weeks! screams **

**Sakra-chan****: xD alright, alright. I gotcha. Sorry I didn't send this in for beta-ing. I wasn't sure if you still wanted to do it or remembered who I was or anything. ;;**

**AznPuffyHair****: Thanks for the long review, so lessee if I can answer the questions/comments. Um, 1) I think at the end of chapter 2 I said it was taking place during the time Kakashi is hospitalized after fighting off Deidara/Sasori in the River country, and it's taken place over about 1-2 weeks. We'll say 1.5 just to be safe. 2) Yeeaaah...I didn't really feel like putting them in. 3) Um, I didn't really feel like doing that either. No offense or anything, but I like keeping my focus around the main characters of the story. I have a hard time going back and forth, and then it just wouldn't fit with the story. I mean, suddenly putting in a big dramatic scene with Naruto/Rin...I couldn't do that without regretting it. And yeah, I actually used one of Kabuto's jutsu (the whole corpse puppet thing). Thanks so much for the long, thoughtful comment! I'm glad you put time into it. :) **

**Eldr-Fire****: She's not dead:D Confusing, ne? First she is, then she isn't, then she is... I don't think I'll be "killing her" again though. **

**Kazumi Tachikawa****: Sadly, yes. Poor Kakashi... Anyways, thanks so much for the kind words. I really appreciate it!**

**broken0dream****: ;; your review...almost brought tears to my eyes. I feel so honored. Thank you so much for you kindness!**

**kakashifangirl51****: Ahaha! Thanks so much! I'm glad you like it.**

**anbu10****: nervous laugh yeeeah...like I said before, sorry about taking so long. Hopefully you haven't forgotten all about me at this point. xP**

**H'okay! I think that's about it for the thanks. Um...Kakashi is a bit OOC this time around, but what's to be done? I dunno. I think I'll be wrapping it up in the next few chapters...maybe. So...**_**yeah**_**! Until then, I'll be pounding away at the keyboard as always. **

**- Hikari**


	9. A Quiet Ending

**Chapter 9****: A Quiet Ending**

The blistering wind tore into his exposed skin as viciously as the _Ninken_ tore into enemy shinobi. Kakashi couldn't stand cold weather like this and for good reason too. The Jounin was sure it would claim him in a matter of hours which put a bit of stress onto the whole "finding Rin" thing. He couldn't let her wait for him in this blasted weather. She'd probably be weak from performing that _Shikon no Jutsu_ so many times. Kakashi silently tried to count the number ...so far he was at three, but who knew how many she had really preformed? Hell – he might not have ever seen the "real" Rin during this whole ordeal! What a nightmare...

Kakashi grunted as he slumped down at the base of a large pine tree. The snow was so thick and the wind so fierce – this was surely nothing short of a blizzard. How was he to find anyone on this God-forsaken mountain in this God-forsaken weather?

"Rin...where are you...?"

It was so damn cold. Kakashi's eyelids slowly began to close, ever so slightly. He knew it was wrong. He knew it was going to be the end of him...but it felt so damn good. Just a moment wouldn't hurt. He was so tired...so very tired. And when he slept he never failed to dream of Rin – she was always there in his sleep, even if she proved elusive here in Reality.

"Rin..."

"_Yes?" _

"Where are you? Where did you go?"

The ghostlike visage smiled softly_. "What are you talking about? I'm right here, silly." _She was so beautiful in her white robes, her brown eyes sparkling more brilliantly than the ice surrounding them. Kakashi immediately thought of those spirits she'd once spoken of...the ones she'd called "Yōsei". Yes, that's what she was. Rin could bring back the dead to do her bidding, couldn't she? But the Jounin knew she was more beautiful than any of those spirits. Yes, much more beautiful...

"No...you're just a dream. I have...I have to find the real Rin..."

The girl in white laughed lightly, drawing near to him – her body appearing to float in and out of the snowy blasts of wind. She knelt down to place a small hand on his cheek, her thumb running lightly across his skin with a feather-soft gentleness. _"Don't go to sleep yet, alright?" _

He stared lazily into her beautiful brown eyes, reaching up to grasp her hand in his own. "Will you stay with me this time?"

Rin smiled. _"I can't stay here for long...but until someone finds you..." _

Kakashi sighed, his eyes closing finally. "I'm so tired...tired of everything. I'm tired of being lonely, of being here without you. I just...want to sleep now..."

"_Go ahead then. I'm here to care for you now."_

"But you're just a dream, remember?" The girl only chuckled lightly in response, her eyes crinkled in mirth. "I've missed seeing you smile, you know that?" he told her.

"_Shh..."_ she cooed. _"I'm here now..."_

Suddenly, another blast of icy wind whipped through the mountainside, blinding him with that damn powdery crap they called "snow". "_Shit_!" he sputtered, blundering about now that he'd been so rudely brought back to his senses. And of course, the girl in white was gone, just as he'd expected. Kakashi staggered to his feet, wondering how he was supposed to warm himself. Starting a fire was out of the question, and (unfortunately) the blanket he'd packed was already wrapped tightly around his shivering frame.

"Rin..." he moaned loudly, though the wind strangled his desolate pleas. "Rin!"

It was too much. It was too cold... the Jounin couldn't even feel his legs anymore. Was he still breathing? He dropped first to one knee, then the other. And after a moment, he gave in and collapsed fully onto the ground. _"Am I to die without seeing her? Would the gods be so cruel?"_ he mused silently.

"Kakashi..."

"_At least I can see her in my dreams one last time."_

"Kakashi, I'm here now."

"Your voice...it sounds so real. Am I with you yet?" He could just make out a face – the mahogany stains marked her Rin. "Don't go this time."

The girl smiled (was it tearfully?) and nodded. "Alright, I'll stay with you," she promised, gathering the man's shivering body into her arms. "I'll stay with you."

Rin couldn't help but laugh at this whole situation. Here she was, come to Kakashi's rescue. This was most certainly a first for the girl and she didn't doubt that it would be the last. As she hoisted him onto her back and slowly began to trudge forward, Rin wondered what was going to happen next. Yes, she could most certainly revive her former teammate, but what about after that? Would she keep the promise? Could she? The girl sighed heavily, trying to keep her footing while contemplating every aspect of this situation.

"Kakashi-san?"

No answer.

Rin smirked. She knew he wasn't dead – his life signs were still rather strong. Poor man. He was merely exhausted; that must be it.

"Alright then, let's get you warm...and then we'll talk."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

"Mmmm..."

This feeling...it was so dreamlike. Had he died? The man fought to open his eyes, vague recollections of Rin, snow, and death messing with his head. "Where...where am I?"

Something shifted beside him, making Kakashi start suddenly. An enemy?! No...no...this, this was... The Jounin cautiously sat up, noticing there was a thick blanket wrapped tightly around himself and around...

"Rin?!" he breathed unsurely, reaching out to touch her face – his fingers trembling and unsteady. So...it hadn't been a dream. She really had found him and brought him home...well, to shelter at least. "Rin?"

"Ngh?" the figure beside him grunted in response, slowly opening one eye to see who was calling her. "Kakashi-san?" Now both eyes were fully open, a slight panic written across her features as she shot upright. "I-I hope this wasn't too presumptuous of me, but you needed warmth...rather badly, and this was the only way I could keep you alive," the girl hurriedly explained.

He said nothing in response, but only gazed deeply into Rin's soft brown eyes, drinking in every detail. His fingers now found their way to her face, her delicate skin so soft to the touch. She was beautiful...and now... "Is it really you?" he whispered, the tip of his nose just touching hers. "Or is this another dream? Another trick?"

Rin sat frozen to the spot, too scared to move or even speak at first. Finally, she managed to tell him, "It's me this time. No more tricks, Kakashi-san. I swear it."

"Were you ever in Konoha?"

The girl nodded slowly. "Yes. When I first returned, it was me. And when you used the Sharingan in the interrogation room...it was me. But after that..."

Kakashi closed his eyes in despair. He'd hoped that the latter situation hadn't been her. "I'm sorry, Rin-chan. I'm sorry for that...for hurting you again."

"What are you talking about?"

He opened his eyes again to stare curiously at her. "What do you mean?"

Rin smiled sadly. "Why are you apologizing to me? It was rightly deserved. In fact, you've done nothing compared to all the pain I've given you over these last few weeks. So don't apologize, ne?"

He nodded weakly, unable to reply. It was true. She'd put him through absolute Hell – especially these last few days when he'd seen her "die". Kakashi hadn't realized how much pain one could endure and not die themselves. "So..." he began after a moment. "What are we to do now, Rin?"

She only smiled and nestled herself against his body. The Jounin realized he'd already instinctively wrapped his arms around her to keep her close. "I promised I'd stay with you now..."

Kakashi had almost forgotten. "Y-Yes..." he said slowly, wondering where she was going with this. This whole situation was so surreal...the Jounin still wasn't sure if it was a dream or not. "Will you come home with me?"

Rin sighed and buried herself deeper into his embrace, searching for every ounce of warmth and comfort he could provide. Then, slowly and with a smile, she looked up and told him...

"No."

"But how will you keep your promise?" he protested in surprise, shock, and disappointment.

The girl's eyes fell. "Kakashi-san...I will come to meet you in another town. I will stay near you always, but I will never return to Konoha...especially now that I've caused so much trouble to everyone there. What will Tsunade-sama say, hm?" Rin glanced at the dying embers of a fire she'd built several hours ago. "And I practically lived in the hospital for several years. I know how things work there...and I'll have none of it. I'd rather live out the last of my life in peace. No observations, no interrogations, no tests."

Kakashi felt weak, light-headed. Yes, that's right...Rin was still dying wasn't she? And she knew they'd try to fix her back in Konoha. That's why she wouldn't come with him. That's why they'd be separated once more. But no. That wouldn't happen. Not as long as Kakashi could help it.

"I'll protect you. I'll protect you with my life."

Ah, the promise of so long ago. He'd never forgotten had he? Rin couldn't resist smiling a little, her dull eyes softening ever so slightly. In that instant, she felt like the old Rin. The Rin Obito had loved. The Rin Kakashi loved. The Rin who could love them back. But then the light faded. He'd made the promise because of Obito. Not for her. For Obito.

"_I'll look after you for Obito...Because of that, I'll protect you even if I die. Obito liked you...loved you...you were important to him...Because of that, I'll protect you through life and death."_

"Don't bother," she suddenly told him, pulling away from his embrace. "I don't need you to do that. I can take care of myself now, Kakashi-san." The Jounin looked hurt. Rin knew she shouldn't have said that, especially since he was allowing himself to be so vulnerable right now. It was something she knew was rare and precious, yet... "I told you once you couldn't protect me forever...and it's true. Besides, now that Obito-kun has tried to kill both you and me, I am in no mood to honor any promise you made for his sake."

Kakashi stared hard at the girl. "You think I made the promise for _his_ sake?"

"Well, didn't you?" she retorted. "'For Obito' is what you said. Or perhaps you meant something else by that?!"

The Jounin could sense her bitterness by the tone she'd taken. "Rin-chan...yes. At the time, yes. I did promise that because of Obito...but it's different now! You must realize!"

"Realize what, Kakashi-san?"

"Would you quit calling me that?!"

"Oh?" Rin frowned deeply. "And why would I stop? Is it not good enough for you? Is that what you're saying?"

He ran a hand through his silver mane, wondering how exactly such a beautiful moment had turned so ugly. "Please just stop...please stop. I want you to know that I may have promised to protect you for Obito, but it became more than that. It was so much more than that!" he whispered, pulling her back to him. "You were mine. Mine to watch. To care for. To protect. Mine and no one else's. I promised myself that I'd never let anyone touch you so long as I was alive."

"Kakashi..." The girl could have kissed him for that, but stoically refrained – the hint of a blush the only evidence she felt anything at all right now. "I still won't come with you," she told him breathlessly.

Kakashi couldn't believe this was happening to him. Here he was with Rin nestled in his arms – so close and yet so far from her. It seemed his chances of ever being with his love were melting away just before his eyes. The Jounin knew he couldn't force her to come back with him. He'd already seen what happened when he tried that... The man looked away from Rin. "So...you won't come back home?" he rasped brokenly, not bothering to hide his despair.

She shook her head in reply. "Give me a reason, Kakashi-san. One reason is all I ask. Tell me why I should go back to that. My last 'homecoming' was hardly pleasing, and there isn't much time to waste. Why should I go back with you?"

The Jounin gazed sadly into her sepia irises with his blue one. "Do you...care for me?" he asked her, his voice hardly more than a whisper.

"Do I care for you?"

"Yes."

"I care for you very much, Kakashi-san. You know that."

"Well, how much do you care for me?"

Rin's eyes softened involuntarily. He could tell this was hard for her, but he needed to know. "If asked, I would die for you...and I wouldn't use another 'puppet' or my reincarnation technique. The true me would die for you, Kakashi. That's how much I care." The girl peered into his eye questioningly. "Does that answer your question?"

He nodded quietly at first, before pushing, "But then, why will you not come home with me? I have your life, and you have mine. Yet, you won't come home with me?" the man pleaded desperately.

Rin grew tearful at his entreaty. Could he ever know how much pain she was in right now? The girl buried her face in his shirt, hiding her shame from him for as long as she could. Oh, how she wanted to go home with Kakashi! She wanted more than anything to see his face every day, feel his arms around her every night...but how much harder was it going to be when Death stole her from Kakashi's embrace? "Kakashi-san?"

"Yes? What is it, Rin?" he replied, no longer bothering with unnecessary honorifics and formalities.

"Promise me," she told him. "Tell me again - but this time, don't do it for Obito."

The Jounin nodded as he tried to recall the words, though they had never been far from him even after all these years. "I'll look after you," he said. "And I'll protect you even if I die. Obito loved you...you were important to him, but you're even more important to me. _I_ love you...Because of that, I'll protect you through life and death. I swear it."

Rin opened her eyes now (for they'd been closed during his oath), crystalline teardrops resting at the corners of both. Yes, yes this could be enough for her. She knew Kakashi would keep this promise, and with this knowledge...she could die.

"I'm tired," she began slowly. "So...can we go home now?"

Kakashi couldn't help but smile, his heart pounding with relief nonetheless. "Of course, Rin. I'll take you home."

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

And so it was that Rin returned to Konoha with her old teammate, to live out the rest of her days there at his side. Though many would protest her decision to refuse help, Kakashi always made sure that no one touched her but him. Rin was his now, if only for a little while, and nothing would change that.

Seasons changed, a year came and went, and Rin's time finally came. Her death was quiet, just as she'd expected. However, she was not alone in her final moments. Lying neatly within Kakashi's arms, she fell asleep just as she did every night. But this time, Rin would never wake to see her love's face again.

Kakashi had never hurt so much when he realized this the next morning. People said he was a broken man, but Kakashi always denied it. Yes, he was hurting, but he was not broken. As the widowed Jounin laid his white roses down for Rin, he couldn't help but smile. She'd done so much for him these past few years. He hadn't known one could feel so much love, so much happiness. She'd changed him into a better man, and because of that, Kakashi could never forget her.

"_I'll fix us both, because we're both broken, ne?"_

The man gazed lovingly at the picture set on Rin's altar. It had been taken just after her return. She seemed so happy – in fact, not a day went by when he didn't see her gentle smile. "You did a good job, Rin," he said lovingly, reaching his fingers out to trace her smiling face. "I think you made us whole again..."

As he turned and walked away, those present swore they could see tears running down Kakashi's face (though he'd deny this as well later on). Yet, their attention was quickly diverted to the sky above, from which a myriad of glittering flakes had begun to fall.

"Snow..." one man murmured. "In the summer?"

Only one knew that these were last tears Rin would ever shed; the very last bit of her sorrow. And despite his grief, that alone was enough to make Kakashi smile beneath his mask.

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

- The End -

O - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - O

**Wow! It's done and over with (finally). Thank you so much to all you readers/reviewers – I love you all! Thanks especially to Sakra-chan and Eldr-fire. You guys are great, and Sakra-chan – you're a great beta! Erm, thanks to the patience from all of you. I know I didn't update as frequently as I should have. And...I think that's it? Well, see ya'll around. **

**- Hikari **


End file.
